Team Gillis

I have moved!

2009-08-27T13:13:00.002-04:00

Just to let anyone who reads my blog know, I have moved to another site. We are now located at Team Gillis on wordpress. I wasn't happy about moving because I know how this site works, but thanks to work firewalls, I had to switch.

Please come visit over there and change your bookmarks!

Happy Big 0 - 1, Boys!

2009-03-11T14:00:00.005-04:00

As of 9:34 and 9:37AM, by baby boys have officially turned 1. I cannot comprehend that this day is here, and not only is it here, but it came flying at about 1,000 miles per hour! Yet, at the same time, I find it hard to remember life before the boys...like they've always been meant to be here and their arrival was just another jig saw piece put into the puzzle. It's amazing how much love you can have for two little beings that have existed just barely a year!

I plan on posting a year in pictures later, so stay tuned for that...but for now, here is some photos of the boys enjoying their big birthday party last Saturday. It was a fun bash in which over 30 friends and family came to celebrate with Team Gillis, who absolutely adored all the attention (and the food!) :) Please take special note of my cupcakes...again, one of my many great ideas that aren't all that great when I realize how much time and effort it is really going to take!! Enjoy!!

We are the birthday boys!!

yummy, pizza!

Josh's new favorite camera face.

Serenading the boys

Josh Before

Josh After

Brody Before

Brody After

Spill-Proof Sippy....my @ss!

2009-03-02T10:06:00.004-05:00

There are many mythical creatures, ideas, and notions out in the world that people would love to believe in, would do anything to see, would try anything to get to. You know - unicorns, the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, world peace, and spill proof sippy cups.

Oh sure, all the fancy packaging out there touts "No Leaks", "Spill Proof" and all sorts of other blatant lies, but the worst offense is even mentioning the fact that ANY sippy cup is actually spill proof! I have shelled out too much money than I care to admit, just to find that elusive sippy cup that actually does not end up all of the surface of where ever the boys are drinking them. I thought, OF COURSE, just like everything else...if it cost more it must work, right...right?!?!

Nope, nada, zilch. In the world of toddler drinking (and not of the alcoholic variety, what kind of mother do you take me for??), there is no holy grail of spill-proof sippy cups. And it is a sad realization when you discover that the mythical item that you were sure you'd find, never existed in the first place.

I guess I should say how lucky I am for being able to transition from the tag team of bottle/formula to sippy/cows milk. I have heard plenty of horror stories of the pleading and begging of parents to their little toddlers, to "puh-lease just try the sippy cup...it's for BIG boys and girls, don't you want to be a big boy and girl??". None of that in the land of Team Gillis, but really, are you surprised?? I mean these kids eat OLIVES for crying out loud!

So, the best option I could find was the high-tech "Straw Sippy"...ooh, I know sounds fancy, doesn't it?? It allows them to suck just like on their bottles, but this tricky contraption is actually a straw and they have just hopped, skipped, and jumped from bottles to straws, not even stopping to stay at the actually sippy cup for a moment. So surely, I was joyous, thinking I must have the special mommy touch for bottle transition!! I should order up an info-mercial stat and let everyone know my tricks!!!

But really, the joke is on me. Thinking the boys would make less of a mess with said "spill proof sippy straw cups" than they did shaking their bottles left and right just mesmerized with the white splatters all over the floor, the wall, and our clothes. I think in actuality they make MORE of a mess, and yes when they shake there are no more sprays of formula erupting out of a tiny pin prick of a hole...but now they have figured out in their demonic little toddler brains that if they suck as much as they can through the straw, it can't possible all stay in their mouth, but dump all over the front of them on the floor. Which in turn soaks them and completely messes up the floors.

Oh and another clever little trick they have figured out (who knew two "under-oners" could be so smart!) is to leave a little milk at the top off the straw where there is a little well and then they flick the straw with their little teeth and voila! White spray everywhere! ::sigh::

Sorry, don't have anymore time to post, must go wash off my floors, my walls, and my children!

Somebody kidnapped my babies!!

2009-02-24T19:39:00.003-05:00

And in their place left me with these two toddlers:

Seriously?!?!? Where did my baby boys go to? I don't recall them growing up before my very eyes, but I guess the camera doesn't lie, does it? There is no denying that they aren't babies anymore and not just based on this picture, but on lots of things that have snuck up on me:

Josh is officially crawling....wounded soldier crawling, but crawling nonetheless. And man can that kid move only using one good arm and dragging his legs behind him. And what does he craw to the fastest??? The wires of course!
Brody is standing better and better when hanging on to something. While he has no interest in crawling, his favorite activity is spinning around on his butt.
Table food, here they come! They will eat any and everything you give them - no joke! I was eating olives the other day and Brody whined and whined until I gave him a piece, thinking he would spit it out immediately, but nope, he just whined for more!
They both have so many teeth! They are actually trying to chew things, including my feet.
Josh is clapping, and not only clapping, but with the accuracy of a Simon champion of the '80. We clap once, he claps once. We clap five times, he claps five times. No getting anything past this smarty-pants.
Brody is drinking not only from a sippy cup, but a straw sippy cup. And, they don't mind the taste of cows milk which has been slowly incorporated in their diet. But of course not, it's food, isn't it?
They have outgrown all their "age equivalent" clothing and have moved on to 18 & 24 month sizes...preemies, what preemies??

But alas, no mama...not even close, of course if you count "maba" close. Which I don't. Heck, if Matt didn't even count "a da" as close how on earth can I count maba? The quest still continues...maybe, someday, I'll get my wish. To be called the name that I am sure will drive me nuts for the rest of my life. But for now, lay it on me kids....mama me up, mama it to me, it's all about the mamas (wha!wha!) baby!

As for me, I'm getting quite weepy at the prospect that I no longer have two little preemies to care for, but two growing, independent on my hands. Really, where did the time go?? And to think, about a year ago I was on bedrest in the hospital on the precipice of some fantastic voyage that I hadn't the faintest idea what was in store for me. All the sleepless nights, all the hospital visits, all the hospital stays, all the spitty clothes, all the blow out diapers, all the thoughts of how on earth was I going to take care of not one, but two infants! I won't lie, I've thought about running away a few times (ha! The way I run, where was I going to go, to the end of the neighborhood before I was done!), but it was all worth it. All the smiles, hugs, giggles, raspberries, and all the new things they are learning by the second. It was worth EVERY minute I spent on bedrest, in the NICU, and nebulizing two very angry boys. They are a joy to behold and cannot wait to see what the future lies in store for us...

Maybe, just maybe, a "mama" :) Pretty, puh-lease!!

Just a running talley...

2009-02-01T19:18:00.003-05:00

...of the boys' vocabulary so far: dada, baba, yaya, fafa, uh-oh, and all done! (don't ask...)

As you can see, there is one word that is strangely missing. One word that you're sure would be spoken before uh-oh and all done for that matter! Well, at least I was SURE that the elusive "mama" would have been uttered before any two word phrases. But sadly, it has not :( Well, I am fibbing, because just today, Josh said maba...but in my book that just doesn't count!!

And, with me going away on my first business trip since the boys have been born, I am now worried that they will indeed utter the words that I have been practically willing out of their mouths. Of course, why wouldn't they say mama while she is 3,000 miles away??

I also dread that I will miss them crawling, not that they aren't already mobile, because they are. They can roll so quickly across a room, it'll make your head spin. And you know what they are rolling to?? Nope, not all those bright, loud, and colorful toys....not those, but those fascinating wires coming out of the wall. And that absolutely intriguing dog toy that MUST be much more fun than one of their 10,000 toys scattered around the house!

So, now I am faced with a decision...go the full disclosure route with Matt, with strict instructions to videotape any new milestones, or I could decide that the "ignorance is bliss" mind-set is the way to go, asking to not be posted about ANY actions that may or may not have occurred while I was gone. The jury is still out, but I have a feeling that I will want to know if they have indeed called out for their momma. A little piece of my heart might break at the fact that I wasn't there to hear it, but at the same time it would be nice to know that they didn't forget about the person who loves them more than anything in the whole wide world, even though I have to be away from them for 4 full days...sigh.

So I will let you know how it goes to be without all my men for the first time since their existence...I'm not going to lie, I am looking forward to waking up to an alarm clock for the first time in 10 1/2 months instead of waking up long before the alarm is to go off and ages further from the sunrise itself. But man, will I miss the smiles, and the giggles, and the funny faces, and the games, and the snuggles. But, strangely, I won't be missing the super-duper explosive wonders that come from an hour in the jumparoo :)

Wish me luck, tomorrow...and not too many tears when I leave. Don't worry, I've already loaded my ipod with hundreds of photos to remind me of them and have demanded that Matt send me photos on my phone throughout the week! And here's some photos to make me (and hopefully, you) smile, because I need it.

Which is worse...

2009-01-18T16:24:00.006-05:00

A) That I didn't take the boys' 10 month photo until a week later (and it says so in the sigh, you just can't see it, heehee),

B) That I am not that upset about waiting a week until their 10 month photo,

or

C) That the pajamas and bedhead are not because they just got out of bed, but because they just got up from their 2PM nap??

My guess is that none of you MOMs will think any of the above is bad or out of the ordinary, and pretty much neither do I. I'm just glad that I got their 10 month photos taken in the same month, let alone the same week!

'tis life with twins...your best laid plans kinda get thrown out the window, that is the window of a skyscraper, in the middle of a hurricane during the end of days. In other words, your plans will go pretty much the exact opposite that you were hoping. You start to actually consider yourself lucky if 10% any plan sees the light of day. "Oooh, the boys are being particularly good in their jumparoos today, I think I will organize my pantry" And the boys will be perfect angels up until you have ALL the items pulled out of the cabinet and you are actually going to start the organizing process...that is when both of them decide almost on cue, that they are capital D-DONE with the jumparoos thanks to their incredibly poopy diapers in which the poop has not only made it all the way down to their toes, but in fact has gone against gravity (as only poo can do, I'm convinced) and worked itself up their backs. It's then time to dump both babies into the tub and clean them while trying not to re-poop them with the clothes that you are wearing. So you decide to strip down naked since you are filthy and they are soaking you anyway. By the time you've bathed them, dried them and dressed them, it's time for their next meal in the disaster area that's called a kitchen because you thought it'd be a GREAT idea to organize (never again...my pantry can stay disorganized, thankyouverymuch!)

So I had all these great plans to update my blog regularly while on my Christmas vacation and as you can see, I did a piss poor job at it. But what can you do?? I'm just proud that I haven't thrown my hands up in the air and decided I'm through with this whole blogging business! I sure could use the free time for something more "me" oriented...like taking a long bath, reading a trashy magazine, or even just doing nothing (I know, I know, I'm so silly that way!). But in reality, I love doing this...updating people on my life as hectic as it is. And I love that one day I can sit Josh & Brody down (if they're even speaking to me, that is, since I will sure be so uncool) and show them what it was like for us when they first entered the world. The joys, the setbacks, the disappointments, the craziness, the laughter...all of it! So, while I may not post as much as I'd (or my family) would like, I am in this for the long haul...some posts just might be lengthier than others with all my updates :)

Speaking of lengthy posts - this is going to be one of them. If I'm boring you to tears, feel free to leave, I won't take offense...or just browse through the photos if that's what you're really here for, I don't mind. The fact that you've even read this far impresses me beyond belief!!

Alright, so Christmas was good in the Gillis house. Not great, thanks to the boys starting down the slippery slide to sickness again. Thankfully, we were able to nip it in the bud pretty quickly, thanks to marathon nebulizing sessions. The boys are now on an inhaled steroid for a month in order to help keep the brochiolitis at bay and maybe eliminate the chance of future asthma. And they are doing pretty well with it, well, I mean with not being sick, they actually HATE the nebulizer mask with a passion and it's always fun to guess how they will struggle today to get out of it. I'm thinking their father is teaching them wrestling moves already, and it's sad to say that they are working on poor old mom.

Anyway, I digress...Santa was so good to the boys (I remember telling Santa to keep it low key this year, AHEM), and they got all sorts of fun toys and warm clothes. Here are some clips from the holidays:

The Stockings hung with care:

Brody's 1st Christmas Gift

Josh loving the paper more than the gift!

What are you trying to tell me, dad?

Can't wait to get that giant ball in my mouth (minds out of the gutter, ladies and gentleman!)

Wow, this toy is loads of fun!

Aren't we freakin' cute in our Christmas outfits??

Brody, and old pro at opening gifts now...

What is this box of awesomness?!?!

How many days is Christma, Ma??

As you can see, they were literally opening gifts for days!! It was so much fun to be a part of that, and can only imagine how much fun next year will be with two toddlers...yikes!!!

Speaking of toddlers...our boys are "this close" to crawling. Not to say they aren't mobile already, cause those two are some seriously mean rollers. They can easily get from point A to point B (usually an electrical cord or a socket) in a blink of an eye, but it's not through traditional crawling. I was told that I never really crawled myself, I scooted backwards and then went straight to walking, so I'm wondering if the boys will take after their mother on that front. Of course their father was walking at 9 months, so I'm sorry to say that they aren't quite there yet. Well, to be honest, I am not sorry that they aren't walking yet. I am really dreading two mobile babies and was perfectly happy with raising two baby blobs for the rest of my life! Unfortunately, the babies have already had a taste of mobility and will most certainly be crawling and walking in no time...and once that happens, life as I know it will be over...along with my savior, the jumparoo!

What else??? Well, both boys have two bottom teeth and Brody has a top one surfacing. I have yet to capture a good photo of the teefies, but will be sure to post when I do. And they have figured out how to feed themselves, but that's a whole other post :) We are still able to feed them for the most part which makes my life a little easier (and WAY cleaner), at least for now...

Other than that, i am trying to eat up every moment of their first year that I can, because in less that two months, my boys will be ::GASP:: 1 whole year old! Project "General Lee" is in full swing...and if you aren't sure what I mean, you will!!

Thanks for stopping by and being patient with this blogger. Hopefully the cuteness helped lure you back in :) And I'll end with a few more since it's been such a long time:

Merry Christmas to all...

2008-12-24T22:08:00.004-05:00

And to all a good night! Happy Holidays from Team Gillis! Hope Santa gets you everything you asked for. I borrowed a couple of his elves as you can see:

And of course you can't forget Ms. Santa Claws herself:

Enjoy this time with your family and friends!! I must admit, having kids makes Christmas special again! And for all that have been following...here's to a completely and totally uneventful 2009, we need it!

Photo Tag

2008-12-20T08:44:00.004-05:00

Monica over at her blog Jonas Family tagged me for photo tag....here are the rules:

1) Choose the 4th folder where you store your pictures on your computer

2) Select the 4th picture in the folder
3) Explain the picture

4) Tag 4 people to do the same

NO CHEATING! (cropping, editing, etc!)

I was pretty curious as to what was the 4th photo in the 4th folder on my iPhotos (and I am sure you are waiting with baited breath as well!), so without further ado -

::sigh of relief:: Thank goodness it wasn't one of my baby shower photos, because if I have any say, they are not going to see the light of day...EVER!

Anyway, this is a photo of Matt and I at our friend Steve & Wendy's wedding. From the look of it, this was taken prior to the copious alcohol that we consumed there. See, Steve & Wendy were nice enough to sit our table (a table of very social drinkers) right next to the bar! Good times, good times :)

I tag MJ at Now is not a Time, Megan at The Wilsons, Aimee at The Barbagallo Twins, and Laura at Taylo 2 Babies...but don't feel the need to do it if you don't want too, but I had to say I was intrigued with what photo would pop up under these rules :)

Quick Update - The boys had their 9 month appointment and Josh weighs 20lb2oz (50%) and Brody weights 21lb4oz (75%) Their height and head circumference is wonderfully average as well. These boys have quintupled their birth weight in 9 months! Way to go, boys!! Oh, and Josh finally sprouted his first tooth - so for those of you who are keeping track (I'm guessing this is information only a mother could care about) Brody has two bottom teeth, and Josh has one. All the better to eat their Christmas cookies with, my dear :)

Miracle of Miracles...

2008-12-19T07:55:00.003-05:00

Date: December 7th, 2008
Place: Our house (specifically, our living room floor)
Time: Not sure, it was daylight (give me a break, I'm lucky I still remember my own name!)
Witnesses: Me, Matt, Grandma & Grandpa H
Event: Both boys holding their own bottles together for the first time!!
Evidence: Photographic (kinda creepy how much that word can look like pornographic if you look too quickly!)

And it has been smooth sailing ever since....now I'm just flat out lying, but the boys holding their bottles is a very momentous occasion, even for a mom of a singleton! Baby holding their own bottle=free hands for all involved! In fact, I didn't even know what to do with myself those first few times in which they were holding their own bottles...I just stared in disbelief, knowing that (in the words of Jack Johnson) I was sitting, waiting, wishing for this day to arrive.

And it seems, just like every other milestone that I look forward to, it actually bittersweet. Because, it is one less thing the babies need me for. Look at these self-sufficient little guys. Soon enough they'll be changing their own diaper (which in reality would be fabulous, especially the really messy ones!), mixing their own bottles, and climbing into their own crib!

As much as I am NOT ready for my boys to up and move away to college...as a mother of multiples, I was more than ready for them to be able to hold their own bottles. As I am sure most people don't think about, the logistics of one person feeding two (or more!) babies is quite challenging, at least bottle feeding. Here's our methodology for feeding twins:

1) You have to find a secure (i.e. buckled-in) place to put the babies - when they were tiny, the boppies worked fine because there was no moving around, then we moved to the swings, because the boys sure as hell didn't enjoy them for the soothing motion, and the carseats were always perfect for this method when out in public, then finally we were using their bouncer seats.

2) When the secured area is located, you then need a prop - which can be a pillow, a blanket rolled up, a coat...pretty much anything that you can fold, roll, or mash up to hold up a bottle.

3) Once the little contraption was set up, you placed the bottles onto said props and then would sit and wait until one or the other's bottle would fall. And then screaming would ensue, especially those extremely fun times when both bottles would fall and you were just NOT quick enough and the world was crashing in because the boys didn't have their bottles.

4) And then you had to burp them, of course one at a time, which doesn't seem like a big deal, but when you have babies with bad reflux, this was a beat the clock kind of situation. Because as you were burping one, if you didn't get to baby 2 soon enough, he would then spit up half his bottle. And then more screaming would ensue (mostly me, as I remember).

So, although bittersweet, it is more so a sweet era in the Gillis household!! Now, if they could only use the toilet....

Wow, 9 months old...already!?!

2008-12-14T17:47:00.006-05:00

Really??? My boys are 9 months old?? My little preemies that spent what felt like an eternity in the NICU?? I mean look at 'em, they think they are old enough to wear flannel and crowd surf! (Matt's contribution to the blog photos, if you didn't know he is obsessed with the 90's grunge movement and nothing makes him happier than flannels being back in):

Well, as you can see, they aren't so preemie in size anymore. We don't have their 9-month well visit to the doctor until tomorrow, but I'll make an educated guess based on their weights from their stay in the hospital...and we can see how close I am!

Josh - 20lb 9oz
Brody - 21lb 14oz

We'll see how close I came tomorrow, but I am guessing that I am not that far off. I'm so happy to have such strong, growing boys!

Speaking of which, my boys are now in full effect, 12 month clothing. Um, what happened to the 9-month clothing?? They kinda skipped over it, passing Go and collecting their 200 dollars. And the Gerber clothing?? Fuggetaboutit, they are in 18 month sleepers! They can't even fit into any of the uber cute "My First Christmas" clothing because they are too damn big. I guess the baby clothing companies have decided amongst themselves that if they are fitting in 12 month clothing, math predicts that they have indeed already had a "First Christmas" and are not in need of a "Baby's Second Christmas" getup. But to me that is just weight-ist, because although I know my boys are big guys, they are not by any means the most ginormous children out there and what about those other poor huge babies that can't fit into any of the Christmas clothing available?? It's a sad state of affairs, I'll tell ya!

Anyway, let me tell you what is up with my babies (sigh, more like little boys) - they are both sitting up on their own and have been for about a month or so. Of course, they topple over from time to time when there is a particularly fascinating toy (or dog) out of their reach. Their vocabulary has expanded and includes dada, baba, and gaga.....but, sadly no mama. I mean short of my life mimicking that famous scene in "Being John Malkovich" with mama being the only phrase we speak, I have no clue how to get them to say mama! I know, I know, someday I will rue the day that they can say my name and will wish that they could forgot it. But in all honesty, all I want for Christmas is my boys to call me mama (not that you have to take anything back for me, I'll use all the other gifts to numb my pain).

What else...they are obsessed with balls, which makes us obsessed with finding the lost ones throughout the house. Considering some of the toys they are playing with are meant to be Christmas gifts, it's kinda pathetic that we have already lost some balls prior to December 25th (and no family Christmas toys were included in this ball tragedy, I swear!).

Oh and the boys have now graduated to the big boy tub!! Here are some photos of the big event:

And finally (drumroll, please!)......THEY ARE HOLDING THEIR OWN BOTTLES!! Oh, happy day! But that is such news that it merits its own post, so stay tuned :)

My child has mini razorblades in his mouth…

2008-12-09T18:10:00.002-05:00

Two of them to be precise. Apparently all Brody wanted for Christmas this year was his two bottom teeth (so does that mean I can return the millions I spent on toys this year??). But now that he has them, all he wants to do is chew on everything, his favorite subject being his mother’s poor nose…and fingers. Apparently he has a taste for flesh, which leads me to believe that Brody is A) a zombie, or B) a vampire-in-training (although he has drawn blood, he has not learned the skills to actually suck it, yet).

His brother has yet to go over to the dark side, but I have a feeling it is really just a matter of time. I can feel a lump on his bottom gum, meaning there is a tooth under there just dying to burst through, but in the meantime is making Josh (and us) miserable. So I am not sure which is worse, having a baby with teeth that wants to gnaw on any body part that gets in his way, or a baby that is super grumpy-pants from his sore gums. I think I am leaning towards the super grumpy pants baby, because at least it doesn’t cause me physical pain…or loss of blood.

So I am guessing I need to find some good sturdy branches for chewing in order to dull down the honed blades on Brody’s teeth, unless anyone else out there has better ideas…

I know, I know, I know...

2008-12-07T20:34:00.004-05:00

...it's been forever since my last post, but please don't yell at me!! I have very good excuses, er, reasons for my lack in posting and you will feel really badly for yelling at me at my lack of posting.

(So here's a cute photo of the boys in their holiday card outfits to help you to forget your disappointment in my non-posting)

First off, as most parents dread, we had our 1st AND 2nd visits to the ER over Thanksgiving weekend (well, with twins, you get to do two of everything, right...even the crummy stuff). The first visit occurring on actual Thanksgiving day with Josh waking up with tons of gooey gunk in his eyes. Well, I say waking up, implying that the poor boy actually slept the night before, but in reality his sleep probably added up to about 45 minutes in total. So, my husband being the trooper that he was staying with Josh through the night, I took one for the team and took Josh to the Emergency Room while Matt stayed home and entertained a wide-awake Brody.

It was a very run of the mill ER visit with very little waiting, thankfully (I'm guessing not too many people have turkey frying burns at 9AM). We got our eye ointment and were sent on our way. Too bad it meant that we were now quarantined at home on the best food day of the year. And to add insult to injury (or is it injury to insult, sigh, mom brain at work here, ladies and gentlemen), we had to spend our day of cleaning. And not normal cleaning, nope, we had to sanitize every living thing in our house, every toy, every fabric, EVERYTHING. In hopes that said pink eye would not be passed on to me, or Matt, or Brody. We knew that this could be all in vain, our futile attempt at de-germing the house, but we had to at least try.

Needless to say, we ended up at the ER on Sunday night for Brody this time...his eyes had gotten all gooey after an afternoon nap. And Josh's pink eye never totally went away, so we decided to bring them both in to get checked out because they seemed a little on the wheezy side as well. So, we packed up and off we went to the ER, but unfortunately, there were many, many more people there than the last time, so we had a feeling our night would be spent surrounded by all sorts of sickness and injury. But unfortunately, we were wrong.

They took Josh back right away, which if you know anything about emergency rooms, that is not a good thing. Especially when there were 20-odd people waiting before us. Matt took Josh back to get looked at while I stayed in the waiting room with Brody who was apparently not quite as sick as his brother and could stand to wait a while. Minutes felt like hours until they finally took us back to be with Matt & Josh. I was expecting the worst after many flurried text messages back and forth with Matt (thank goodness for technology!) saying how it wasn't good what was going on with Josh, and he was right. Poor guy couldn't breathe well at all, so it was decided that he was going to be on oxygen while they were waiting for tests results to return. And then his brother had to go through the same torturous poking and prodding that his brother did, but unfortunately I was there to witness Brody's screaming, unlike Josh's. Long story short, both boys were admitted to the pediatric floor of the hospital to be monitored overnight.

But the overnight monitoring turned into a 5 day stay at Chez Lowell General, which is not what we were expecting in the least. And it was a tortuous 5 days, with lots of poking and prodding the boys, taking temps, suctioning noses (the WORST thing EVER), administering breathing treatments. And this happened AROUND THE CLOCK, meaning no sleep for anyone, worst of all no sleep for the poor sick little boys. Finally on our last full day, we had had it and told the nurses that while, yes, it was important for the boys to get checked out, it was JUST AS IMPORTANT for them to get their sleep! Thankfully, they agreed and our last night I think we actually got 2-4 hour blocks of sleep which is the most we had the entire time there.

And now we are home, glorious home, but still needed to administer breathing treatments, nose suctioning, and medication. Turns out the boys had RSV (click this link to read about it, it's not a fun thing for babies, but preemie babies, especially), Pink Eye, Ear Infections, and Pneumonia (just Josh had this). Poor guys, when they get sick, they REALLY got sick! Thankfully, they are so much better, although not 100%. We are still quarantined to the house because they could still pass on the RSV to other babies, so better to be safe than sorry.

So now, in order to keep our boys safe we have decided to cut way back on their exposure to other people. Which means; no big parties, no mall, no Santa (sniff, sniff), no sick people visiting. While our boys may not look like preemies anymore, their immune systems still are, and will be for the first two winters. So, I apologize ahead of time if there are times where we can't visit or have people visit us, but we gotta do what's best for our little guys. They are our priority now.

I have lots more to share with you regarding the boys and all they are getting into now a days, but that will be for another day. Just wanted to update you on Team Gillis and promise now that the sickness has subsided for the most part, I'll be able to update more frequently...I promise!!

And on that note, here are a couple fun photos of the boys that I took this weekend (they are getting so big and so fun!) :

Happy Halloween!!

2008-11-01T09:34:00.007-04:00

I hope that everyone had a great Halloween! The boys really seemed to enjoy their first Halloween, and even tolerated their costumes for a couple hours. Since it was nice enough to be outside, we set up the jumparoos and the whole Gillis clan helped to hand out candy. The boys were a hit once trick or treaters realized that they were actual babies :)

The good news is that we had more than enough candy for all the kiddies this year...the bad news is that we have so much candy left over that it is ridiculous!! And I've enough that just looking at the candy make my teeth ache. Anybody want some candy?? We gots the good kinds too, no Charleston Chew at our place!!

Here are a few Halloween shots of the boys...I think their costumes fit their personalities perfectly. Josh was a teddy bear and Brodyman was a monkey. Enjoy!

I'll see your "da" and raise you a "dada"!

2008-10-25T11:29:00.004-04:00

Yep, it's official...our boys have uttered their first dada's, and the amazing this is that the boys did it 12 hours apart! There was a big dada race going on in our house with a lot of close calls, but Brody is the official winner. Josh might be the big roller, but Brody is without a doubt our big talker :) We thought for a while that Josh might be the dark horse in the race and just up and say dada while Brody has been practicing his da's for a week or so, but Josh let his brother have the first to do award in this category.

And while I am absolutely thrilled with this new found talent, no one could be more proud than their dada. He has been completely beaming since last night at 7:50pm, and the lucky bastard got to experience that rush again this morning from Josh. What a thrill it is to experience such a fantastic milestone!!

Ok boys, now you got the easy word out of the way....start using those new found tongue techniques and start practicing those "mamas" because she will hit the roof if your second word is Lucy!! I didn't carry you for 9 (well 8) months and sit in a hospital bed for 3 weeks for our family pet to become the next part of your new vocabulary!!

7 Months Down...

2008-10-19T09:41:00.005-04:00

So, Josh & Brody are taking their 7 month birthday a little hard...so hard, in fact, the boys have turned to the bottle in their depression. See, now that they are closer to 1 than they are to being born, and they need to drown their sorrows. And as you can see from below, they are feeling no pain (I promise you, no babies were intoxicated in the production of this photo):

Sorry it has been so long since I posted an update, but I have a lot of reasons for the lapse in postings:
1) I have twins!
2) My work has converted over to our parent server and I cannot access blogs from work
BOOOOO!!!!
3) The only free time I have when I am home is used for catching up on sleep!
4) And finally, I have 2 seven month old twins - what do you expect :)

Anyway, the boys turned 7 months old last week! I shed a few tears thinking that my boys are closer to turning 1 than being born. I just can't believe how fast the time has gone!! I still can remember being as huge as a house still pregnant with them. Now they are talking up a storm, unfortunately not in the english language yet, but I feel that "dada" is just around the corner.

And Josh has officially rolled over!! The boys have mastered the belly to back roll-over long ago, but Josh again was first in the back to belly roll-over. He completed the full movement just shy of his 7 month birthday and we are thinking that Brody is soon to follow. Of course, once Josh rolls over , he is not quite sure what to do once on his stomach. So he proceeds to fuss and fuss until we pick him up or put him on his back. And you've guessed it, as soon as he is on his back, he's back on his belly screaming again. I'm sure it's amusing to someone, but it is quite tiring to be on baby roll-over duty!!

And in their seven months of life, it is amazing how different these two little men are! Josh is my observer, my cuddly guy, and my human bat. There is nothing that he loves more than being upside down!! I am convinced he would live that way if he could. On the other hand, Brody is my outgoing flirt, with the mischeivous smile. He is full of giggles and loves to get into anything that he shouldn't. But both my guys are such good natured boys, I can't help but feel like I hit the "baby jackpot". And the fact that they've been sleeping through the night since 3 months has been a HUGE help in everyone's santiy.

Speaking of sleeping, both boys are officially off swadles as well! I was convinced I would have to commission some seamstress out there to sew up some adult size swaddles for when they went off to college, but thankfully, I didn't have to cross that bridge! I was actually shocked at how easy it was because I had visions of tantrums and fights and major sleep deprivation, when in reality we went sans swaddle cold turkey and haven't looked back since. We were smart enough to do one at a time, though, and it worked in our favor. I hope that everyone out there in swaddle land has as easy of a time as us!

Ok, I'm off to go hang out with my handsome men (all three of them!), but here are a couple of outtakes from their 7-month "photo shoot":

Happy Birthday to ME!!!!

2008-10-07T06:20:00.004-04:00

I cannot believe that today I am the big 3-0!! What I can't believe even more is that it does not bother me one bit! I thought that I might be in a birthday depression like my husband was three short months ago, but I woke up feelin' fine (even though Josh wanted to remind me over AND over that it was my birthday by waking me up!). And even though I have to work today, it's really not too bad.

I do feel like walking around saying "I'm THIRTY!" in that Molly Shannon-esque voice from Saturday Night Live. And for anyone that is getting my reference, I can still "kick, stretch, and KICK"!

Of course I have a lot to show for my 30 years on this planet...I've got two absolutely adorable sons, an absolutely wonderful husband, an absolutely cute basset hound, and an absolutely generous and supportive family. Really, what more could I ask for?? There is no reason to be down about my life when I have so much to celebrate!!

So, I am taking 30 by the horns and running with it. You're only as old as you feel, and to tell you the truth...I still feel like my mom is going to yell at me any moment for getting pregnant, hehe.

And now I leave you with some photos of what I most look forward to seeing on my big day....oh, and GO SOX!

Happy Anniversary, Mom & Tony!!

2008-10-02T06:51:00.004-04:00

I know this is a day late, but work has been crazy this week, not giving me enough free time to blog (terrible, I know), but I wanted to wish my parents a fabulous 20th wedding anniversary!!! What makes me feel old is that I was 10 when you got married and I remember the entire thing! I can't be old enough to have been around for a 20th wedding anniversary, could I? Well, I am glad that I was there and that 20 years later the two of you are as cute as ever!!

Here's to another 20 years, and I can only hope that my marriage is as good as yours!!

Nanny-gate is over!

2008-09-29T08:49:00.008-04:00

We have found someone to watch our boys!! Woohoo!! I love good news and I love to be able to share good news! We've had so much crummy news to share over the past 8 months or so, that it is so nice to be able to have some good news, with no strings attached!! She was just under our noses as well, being my sister-in-law's future cousin-in-law (I know, I know, too confusing for a Monday morning!). She has just graduated from nursing school and will watch our boys for us at our house until January, when she finds a job. She has already been a big help and watched the boys last week after the big blow out between Matt and "she-who-will-not-be-named". Thank you everyone who has shown so much concern and well wishes for us, we cannot thank you enough for sending us good babysitter vibes our way!!

So three cheers for our new babysitter, Jess. Hip Hip Hooray! Hip Hip Hooray! Hip Hip Hooray! And look at the cuteness that she gets to be a part of, I mean really, who wouldn't want to watch these cuties??

Our Babysitter Quit

2008-09-23T20:29:00.002-04:00

Sorry, no witty blog today...our babysitter for the boys has quit, giving us until the end of the month to find someone new. I am so utterly and completely pissed right now and feel like a fool for using this woman. On top of it, she is my husband's boss's wife, so that should make things really fun :(

So for now, my free time will consist of trying to find ourselves some reliable daycare that doesn't completely put us out on the street due to cost. There is already talk of second jobs for us if need be, so although that would really, really, REALLY suck, we gotta do what's best for the boys.

If anyone knows of any good nannies or daycare in the Merrimack valley, feel free to leave a comment. If not, please keep your fingers, toes, and any other appendages crossed for us. We need all the good karma we can get. Hmmm...short of the boys being born, 2008 hasn't been the best year for us, huh??

Well there's only how many days left in the year?? 99 based on some website, so we are into double digits now, hopefully 2009 will be a little less dramatic than this year has been. Here's to some wishful thinking....

Welcome to the house of whine, would you like some cheese with that?

2008-09-19T14:10:00.005-04:00

For those of you who (whom?) don't believe in Karma, I have a little story to pass on. You see, I grew up an only child, meaning, that I didn't have to share anything; toys, clothes, bathrooms, parents, etc. Well, I didn't have to share for the most part, but of course I did grow up with cousins and friends, which meant that I had to learn to share...and I was NOT a fan! So, as most only children do when they don't get their way; they whine, they whine a lot. I was a professional whiner and could pretty much out-whine any adult in a 10 mile vicinity. I had a tolerance for whining that was very impressive and could break down pretty much anyone that I came in contact with. To this day, I am still a pretty good whiner, but I have to say that I am not even a shell of my former self. My mother would always warn me not to whine, that it's not polite, it makes me look spoiled....blah, blah, blah. And my husband, well, he pretty much ignores me now when I whine, or, even worse, he calls me out on it. So, needless to say, whining isn't as big a part of my repertoire any more.

Unfortunately (and this is where the whole Karma thing comes in) for me, I am now inundated with whining, and none (well, most of it at least) of it is mine! Whining is now the boys' favorite past-times, and although they can't speak a lick, they've got whining down to a science (they are their mother's children, no doubt). They whine for their bottles, they whine when they are finished their bottles, they whine for their baby food, they whine when the other is being fed baby food instead of them, Josh whines when I am holding Brody, Brody whines when I am paying attention to Josh, and they both whine when I am holding neither of them!

It is a vicious cycle that continues day in and day out, to which I cannot even imagine how it will escalate when they are older. On top of the boys whining, we have the whiniest dog on the planet. Basset Hounds are known to be stubborn, and this girl takes the cake! You would think that she was an only puppy, but I know better. She is an only doggy in our house though, and was in fact the princess of the house until the boys came. And she whines like you wouldn't believe. She whines when she wants to be let out, she whines when she wants to be let in, she whines when you are eating something that she wants, she whines when you close the bathroom door and she can't get in, she whines when you close the bathroom door and she can't get out! She would sure give the younger version of me a run for my whining money, and just might win, because Lucy never gives up...it never fails to amaze me.

So, now I am filled with a house of whiners, and have no one to blame but myself! If one of my little men isn't whining, then it's the dog wanting to go out at the perfect moment where we just got ourselves tucked into bed. The truth is, I am quite jealous, because no one listens to my whining anymore! So now, I am left to resort to whining on my own blog where no one can tell me what I can or can't do...so THERE!!

6 Month Photos are here!

2008-09-17T09:08:00.003-04:00

So, I realize that every month I elaborate on how hard it is to take ONE good picture of twinfants. This month was no exception, so the photos you are about to see are cute, but not smiley-cute, they are crying baby-cute. You see, Josh wanted NOTHING to do with getting into his cute picture clothes, let alone having to sit with his brother...all this man wanted was F-O-O-D and he let us (and poor Brody) know about it:

In the above picture, I can just see that Brody is thinking "Alright, Mom, not only did you get me in this STUPID outfit, but now you are sitting me next to this crazy guy that is screaming his head off! What on earth did I do to deserve this??"

And all in the name of a cute picture! I'm finding that I am taking less and less photos of the boys thanks to the giant interruption that is my job...so I am going to try and remedy that this weekend. My photo pool is getting smaller and smaller to draw from, and I want to have as much cuteness on record as I can! Hopefully we can bust out these outfits this weekend for their pal Jonah's 1st birthday party...we'll see how well they put up with them then :)

Ridiculous Baby Items 2 - Baby Bling

2008-09-12T10:01:00.009-04:00

OK, so there are no 6 month photos to post :( The boys are teething and were being EXTREMELY grumpy last night, so they were not going to have anything to do with being cute in restrictive clothing for mommy. My plan is to do it this weekend, so they will be in much more receptive moods :)

But, since all of you enjoyed my ridiculous baby items post - meaning I enjoyed writing the post and it's my damn blog - I figured I would do it again. This week's spin off will be baby bling. With all the famous people out there having babies (and twins are so in right now, dahling) there are companies that are trying to cash in on all this disposable income. Needless to say, these things seem ridiculous to us, but I'm guessing there is a market for outrageously priced baby items, or these companies still wouldn't be in business:

Baby Bling Pacifiers

I'm not sure about you, but binkies are a treasured commodity in our house, but not because they are covered with swarovski crystals, but because we are forever losing them (i.e. Lucy steals them and buries them around the house) and they are an important part of keeping our boys calm and content during a "fuss session". And since we are forever needing to buy more, I just cant justify spending $120 on a pacifier that is just going to end up as a dog toy! But if this is right up your alley, they have coordinating items such as rattles for your favorite "aristabrat".

Baby High Heels

I have to admit that these are pretty darn funny, and although they aren't ridiculously expensive, I would say that $35 is quite a bit to pay for heels that your baby can't walk in....heck, I will barely spend $35 dollars on heels myself. I'm kinda hoping that Target will come out with their own version, since that's where I buy my super-uncomfortable heels, why shouldn't my niece have price options herself??

Fantasy Carriage Crib

What little girl (er, baby) wouldn't want one of these to help her ride off to fairytale dreams?? And to think, the price of your baby girl's happiness is only $15,000!!

Princess Coach Crib

Alright, so if you think that a crib the price of a cheap foreign import is a bit too much...here is a "cheaper" version. When I say cheaper, I mean a bargain price of $5,000!! But, remember, all the other little girls' (again, these are babies) moms bought them the supped-up (sooped, souped??) model and that in buying this version, you are only 1/3 of the mom they are.

Really, I could go on and on with all the crazy stuff, but this is where I will stop for now...I need future material! And, since these options are for the female clientele (or maybe pre-metrosexual babies out there), I will do my due diligence to find some male-focused baby ridiculousness. If you happen to see any yourself, let me know!!

Happy 6 Months, Boys!!!

2008-09-11T10:20:00.003-04:00

Oh my God, I cannot believe that six months has flown by as quickly as it has!! It's not fair, can we rewind a bit and maybe play back in slow motion. My little guys (who are not so little anymore, BTW) have been in sweet existence for half a year now, and it has gone by in a blink of an eye.

I will take their 6 month photos tonight - stay tuned for cuteness squared. But in the meantime, here is a photo from their first minutes of existence. Funny how newborns (especially preemies) and old men look exactly alike. You've come a long way, boys!!

Better YOU than ME! And other dumb thing said about being parents to twins…

2008-09-09T10:46:00.005-04:00

This is a sort of spin-off of the freak show post from a while back, but I thought that it would be fun to let you guys in on what happens when you take twins out in public. Along with the whole freak show aspect of being out with twins in public places, is the ridiculous (or downright rude) things that people feel the need to say to you. Here is a list of a few of my favorites:

1. Are those twins?? Nope, I just happened to have two babies that are the exact same age, size, features, etc., but they are most certainly not twins cause that’s impossible!!

2. Are they Natural? They are 100% spontaneous, but as far as I know, all babies are NATURAL.

3. I’ve always wanted twins!! Hmm…are you sure about that one? If you ever feel the urge, you are more than welcome to babysit for us, overnight.

4. Our children are only (insert numbers from 12-18) months apart - it’s just like having twins!! Um, not by a long shot…I am not saying “Irish Twins” are easier, but it is different…very different. Having two screaming newborns at 3AM is much different than only having one. Just like having one screaming infant and one toddler walking around at the same time.

5. So have you started tryin’ for that girl? First of all, is that any of YOUR business?? I love people that think that a family isn’t complete without both sexes represented. Who says all families HAVE to have a boy and a girl?? Maybe we are just happy with our two little guys. And secondly, we have just gotten over that newborn “hump”, so while we might be a little bit nuts, we ain’t that nuts!

6. Better you than me!! Yep, you are right on that one!

7. Whoa, Double Trouble!! Maybe, but what you are forgetting is that there is also double the love and double the fun!

8. They are going to eat you out of house and home!! Really?? Any more than any other family with two boys, but then maybe they have heard rumors about the Gillis boy appetite (and for the record I am terrified!!)

9. Those C-section babies are so much better looking! – Seriously, someone told me that a week after Brody came home and we went out to eat at Friendly’s. It was a man too, which totally threw me for a loop.

But then to be fair, we do get some positive attention and some really nice comments, although the people more likely to stop and comment are the ones that have the craziest things to say. Mostly, we just get a lot of smiles from the not so crazies out in public!

1. Twins!! What a Blessing! Yes, yes it is…is it easy – nope, but is it worth it – most definitely!

2. Wow, you must be a supermom! Now, I will never claim to be anything close to a supermom, but I will certainly not correct someone if they think that I am!

3. I have no idea how you do it! Me neither, but you do what you need to do to get the job done. I believe these are the most empathetic people, because they know how hard it was to do it with just one at a time, so I admit that I do feel a wee bit superior when I get those comments

I have heard from MOMs of twins that are older that one day I will miss the attention, and maybe I will, but for now I can't help but shake my head at most of society. And people as a whole should start using the filter between their brain and their mouth. On the other side, when someone is truly interested and curious to ask questions about the boys, I turn into "Proud Mama" mode and am more than willing to brag about my boys - Just don't ask me if they are natural....

Happy to report...

2008-09-05T16:20:00.002-04:00

That my boys now have the prettiest penises on the block! Not that I know that for sure, but since my boys are the cutest on the block, it only make sense that their anatomy should follow suit :)

Thank you everyone, for all your thoughts and well wishes...unfortunately they wanted the boys to stay overnight for observation due to the fact that they were preemies and that Josh had the long-standing apnea issue. I guess it was better for them, but not for myself and Matt who had to sleep in the world's most uncomfortable recliners!! Plus the boys were in separate rooms, so I ended up staying with Josh, while Matt took Brody. It was bad enough to stay in the hospital overnight, but to stay apart from my other guys totally sucked too. The good news is that I only watched what I wanted to watch of the Republican Convention, as opposed to watching it for hours on end, which my politically obsessed husband has been making me do at home.

One bit of good news was that they were the first up for surgery, so we didn't have to worry about screaming babies at the hospital with everyone looking at us like "What the hell are you doing to your children??". Brody actually ended up falling asleep while he was waiting for his turn, so somebody apparently thought we deserved a little break after all the nonsense that we've had to deal with.

The boys did extremely well for being so far away from their normal routine and environment and even slept through the night which was very surprising due to the fact they slept the entire day away after their surgery. We were convinced we'd have a bunch of night owls on our hands, but our lack of sleep was only due to our wonderful hotel-like sleeping arrangements (note the sarcasm).

Now that our boys are done with their hospital stays for the near future, here's to hoping we won't be in a hospital for a good long time....but since they are Gillis boys and most likely have their mother's supreme grace I am sure we will be doing our fair share of ER visits :)

And if you think my life is crazy!

2008-09-02T16:11:00.003-04:00

Check out our MOMs (Mothers of Multiples) Blog that we put together! My favoritist (yes, I know that isn't a word) message board in the whole world is the Multiples Message Board on the Nest (or the Bump, or whatever the heck they are calling themselves now a days!) decided that since we (as in having multiple babies) are so in right now, that we would post our stories for the world to read. For my friends and family in real life (IRL is the cool message board acronym), these are the girls that have kept me sane over the past year and I wouldn't know what to do without them.

We are hoping that there is a distant chance that we might end up on Oprah, (maybe Oprah's favorite things for mothers of multiples...can you say "free minivan??") so please go visit and read some of the heart warming and tear-inducing stories. The word out on the street is that our leaders for this project have already received some phone calls from the producers, which is a very exciting thing to hear! Of course, I'd just be thrilled to meet these girls who I have come to use as my MOM barometer!! Pass on the link to anyone who might be interested, and you never know, Team Gillis might become famous!!

Here is the link for the blog, but beware there are upwards of 100 posts on there, so grab a glass (or bottle in my case) of wine and wear your procrastination hat!!

T minus one day...

2008-09-02T08:13:00.005-04:00

Until the dreaded "C Day" meaning, the boys big circumcision surgery tomorrow. Just the thought of it puts a pit in my stomach :(

I have to thank my crummy OB for this lovely situation that we have to be in, I mean it's just soooooo exciting to have to deal with two (almost) six month olds going back into the hospital, maybe even overnight. See, apparently when Brody was discharged two weeks after his birth, he was too small to be circumcised at just over 4lbs. We were told that our OB doesn't do circumcisions on babies less that 7lbs (um, what about the full term singletons that might be under 7lbs, they do exist you know) and that we would have to wait until Josh is discharged before the surgery is performed. Well, when Josh was discharged 5 weeks later, I called the OB all ready to get this part done and over with...but she, and when I say she, I actually mean her talking through her nurse since she apparently is too busy to talk to the mother of the boys she was supposed to take care of...anway, she then dropped the bomb on us that we would need a pediatric urologist to do the surgery now. Huh?!? Why wasn't that mentioned previously??

Fast forward to now, almost at 6 months we have to get our boys done. What a nightmare experience, first we had to track down a pediatric urologist, which like it sounds, is a very specialized job and not easy to track down. Once we found one, we made an appointment (albeit a month later) with him, thinking we were actually getting the deed done then and there, but low and behold, it was just a consultation. Well, I had just about had it and almost said screw it, I don't care about whether my boys look like anteaters or not, but realized that although I am their mother, it's their father's final decision. You see, I don't have those parts and I don't want to make a decision without having, ahem, lifelong experience like their father does. After meeting with the doctor, I felt much more at ease because he was very confident (downright cocky actually, pun intended) that he does an excellent job. I think my husband's biggest fear is that the boys would need to get it done later in life when they actually remember it and how traumatic that must be for them, so he'd rather get it now even though it's going to be harder on them, at least they won't remember.

So here I am...counting down the hours until my boys are put back into the hospital. Any mom that has had their baby (or babies) in the NICU has a total and irrational fear of putting their baby back in the hospital, for fear that they might have to stay there; that there was some sort of mistake and the boys shouldn't have been discharged that many months ago, and that we're somehow thrown back into the torture that was living without my babies at home. I realize that at the worst, they might have to spend the night, but in all honesty, I don't want them in the hospital one minute more! They've been in longer than most adults and it's just heartbreaking to take them back.

What's worse is that as of right now, I have no idea when their surgery is going to be. The hospital is going to give me a call today to let me know, but I hate not knowing, especially since the boys will not be able to eat before the surgery. I am hoping and praying that their time will be early, because if not, there are going to be two extremely grumpy screaming babies in the pre-op office. And like I said before, babies screaming in stereo = not fun for mommy.

So please send good vibes my way, let's hope for a 7AM surgery time and for the boys to not have to stay the night. That would be the best case scenario for everyone, and I think it's about damn time we get a little good luck on our side :)

And since the unofficial end of summer has come and gone, here are some pics of the boys on their first trip to the beach and by nana and bop's pool:

Mr. Mom is no longer...

2008-08-25T10:27:00.004-04:00

Yesterday was a sad day in our house....it was the last day of summer vacation for my husband. And usually, I just tell him to suck it up because most of the world is not lucky enough to have more than two months off during the summer, but this year is a little different. It now means that our boys will no longer be watched by their parents :(

We've been very lucky that we were able to finagle a situation that allowed for the boys to stay home for almost six months, but the transition to daycare isn't any easier for us. While it was incredibly hard to leave my boys for that dreaded first day back at work, it wasn't as hard as it could have been, knowing that my boys were in good hands at home with their Daddy.

But, thanks to my friend Molly, I'm going to try to look on the bright side. We will now be a double income family again ::phew:: so now maybe we can get out of the red and back into the black. It isn't fun being the breadwinner for the summer, especially after not getting a paycheck in over 10 weeks. So here's to looking to some positive cash flow heading in our direction!!

Good luck, Matt on that first day back...I feel the anticipation is harder that the reality. I know our boys miss their daddy dearly, and can sympathize with how sad you must be. Remember, there's less than 10 months to go until you can do it all over again!!

My Turn

2008-08-22T11:09:00.002-04:00

My fellow MOM (triplets actually) Pam tagged me for this little questionnaire a while ago and I finally have a chance to fill it out:

How it works:
1. Post the rules of the game at the beginning.
2. Each player answers questions about themselves
3. At the end of the post, the player then tags five people and post their names, then goes to their blogs and leave them a comment, letting them know they’ve been tagged and asking them to read the players blog.
4. Let the person who tagged you know when you’ve posted your answers

Where were you 5 years ago?
I was living in my very own condo and working at Welch's. I had just recently become engaged in July and was probably transforming to bride-to-be mode and having fun with all the research of weddings :)

What are 5 things on your to do list for the week?
1. Make Baby Food
2. Do Laundry
3. Go Grocery Shopping
4. Walk the Dog
5. Pack for our trip down to the beach

What are 5 snacks you enjoy?
1. 100 Calorie Packs (pretty much any of them)
2. Pink Lady Apples
3. Smoothies
4. Fiber One Oat and Chocolate Bars
5. Ice Cream, always

What are 5 things you would do if you were a billionaire?
1. Pay off my debt
2. Pay off our family's debt
3. Set up trust funds for the boys
4. Get a fabulous house on a ton of acres
5. Rescue 50 dogs and have them live on said house

What are five of your bad habits?
1. I am Lazy
2. I Procrastinate
3. I don't like to share (only child syndrome)
4. I am not particularly patient
5. I hate to clean

What are five places you’ve lived?
1. Upstate (very upstate) NY
2. Newark, DE
3. Pittsburgh, PA
4. Amherst, MA
5. Winchester, MA

What are 5 jobs you’ve had?
1. Retail Girl at Halmark
2. Ice Cream Cake Girl at Carvel
3. Coffee Girl at Dunkin Donuts
4. Lab Girl at UMass
5. Food Scientist for Welch's

Five people I tag
1. Megan
2. MJ
3. Annie
4. Valerie
5. Aimee

Adventures in Baby Food

2008-08-19T14:41:00.005-04:00

Well, we have managed to make it through another milestone and remain intact...trying out solid foods!! As new moms know, like anything related to babies, this is a huge decision that is made based on weighing the many pros & cons. When to do it, where to do it, how to do it....there are so many studies and facts and statistics about when and how to introduce baby food, it will make your head spin. And I wonder how much of our taxes are put to silly studies such as "Should babies be introduced to fruits before vegetables?".

There is the mentality from our parents' generation that is wondering why we hadn't started putting cereal into the bottle at 4 weeks to help get them to sleep at night ::gasp:: while the newest information out there states that you should never feed your baby (or babies in my case) cereal until after they turn 6 months old. Some people are so adamant about this that they use the favorite method of the Catholic Church - Fire & Brimstone - when it comes to feeding your baby before 6 months. Oh, the digestive track is too immature, it can cause obesity issues (really, if your baby has a few pureed pears a month early, they are going to get fat??)...blah, blah, blah. And based on all this information overload...I just shut down and decide that when it 'feels' right to try baby food, I will do it. Statistics and news articles be damned!!

So at 5 months, it looked as though Josh was really starting to dig adult food. He would watch memorized while we were eating our pasta, and he was only ever that memorized by the Olympics on the TV...so we decided to delve into the adventure that is baby food!! Lo and behold, they actually seemed to like it! At first they weren't quite sure to think of the whole spoon-feeding scenario, but they are starting to get it and it's becoming quite fun! Just the sight now of the spoon coming to their mouth sends them in a tongue-sucking frenzy since they don't yet understand the whole "open mouth, insert food" concept. It is quite hilarious to watch them trying to suck the spoon like it is their bottle, and immediately get angry when the spoon has been taken out of their mouth to get more food.

It is not the cleanest thing to do, feeding twins. Luckily, right now it's more for practice than anything else...but I see my future very clearly, and am very glad that I painted my kitchen fern green and eliminated white from the wall repertoire. I might even only feed them green foods, so that the splatter is totally undetectable! For now, they are only messing up themselves since their new favorite thing is to shove their fingers in their mouth to scoop up any baby food that might be hanging out on their face. So it proceeds from face, to hands, to chest, to feet...and someone who doesn't miss a beat, is our Lucy. She is my cleanup crew, and I am sure she is already dreaming of that beautiful future where more food lands on the floor than in their mouths :)

I have heard that it takes something like 15-20 introductions to food before the baby starts liking/disliking items, but for now it seems that they don't mind anything we have given them. Brown rice cereal, oatmeal, bananas, they inhale (literally) it all. I am hoping this is a good sign to come and that our children will be foodies just like me (minus that mac and cheese kick that starts about age one and ends at age 3). I can see my boys already, gobbling down escargot at age 4 just like their mother...well, here's to hoping at least!!

So here are a couple of shots of the boys eating:

I'm sure in the future, I will have many more hilarious photos, but this is all I got for now. Now, on the the next adventure...

The Best Invention Ever...so far

2008-08-15T12:23:00.008-04:00

So I know that there are many other great inventions out there, most of which have nothing to do with babies (artificial heart, anyone?) but when you are the parent of a newborn or two, you really only care about items that will make your life easier, i.e. sanity savers.

The first real sanity saver I considered was the pacifier. It's cheap, simple, and does it's job...it pacifies. But, unfortunately our dear boys only like the soothies-type binkies which are very hard to keep in their mouth, without assistance from us. So, while the binkie is a great invention, it is not the best invention.

Something that completely blew the binkie out of the water was the Swaddle-me swaddles by kiddapatomous. They not only allow our babies to sleep through the night thanks to the baby straitjacket construction, but they work on velcro which means it is almost impossible (note, I said almost) for them to wiggle their way out of it!!

(note, this is not my baby, but the high paid swaddle-me model)

I admit, it does look like some sort of torture device, but I assure you, it is not...and I promise that I will find a way to create adult swaddles if it means they will sleep through the night until they go away to college!!

And while the swaddle-me is still on the top of my list of great inventions, I have to say that though, getting a baby to sleep, while important, it is just as important (if not more) to find a way to entertain the baby while awake! Sooner or later (unless I find that adult version!) the swaddle will be put away, but the best sanity saver - THE JUMPAROO will still be there!!

For those of you that are not blessed (meaning, those of you who are not gluttons for punishment, he he) with babies, or for those of you who have had babies a while ago, a jumparoo is a contraption in which you place the baby into a swing-type holder which is attached to a circular tray filled with many distractions for the baby. That tray is then attached to what I can only guess is bungy cords that allow the child to move. Here is a picture:

Our boys have the above "Rainforest Model" which is jungle themed in not only it's garish color choices, but in it's obnoxious melody choices. And while I did try to find a jumparoo to match our non-rainforest decor (crate and barrel, are you listening??), we figured this was our best bet because, at least it matched our other rainforest themed baby items. Well, I couldn't care less about how obnoxious the look and/or music is...the bottom line is that it ENTERTAINS OUR BABIES!! And not for a few minutes, but hours at a time!!

And even better, it puts our babies to sleep, without said baby straitjacket! Oh, what a glorious invention!! Not only are our babies happy, downright joyous in this contraption, they jump themselves to sleep!! Here is the evidence (note, some pics are taken with a video camera and some with a regular camera, so please excuse the graininess of some of the photos)

Here's Brody, dreaming of jumping...

And Josh, passed out from his jumping excursion...

And here are some photos of the boys actually consciously enjoying their jumparoos :) Josh is very fascinated with the wheel that makes noise when he spins it!

And here is Brody wondering how to get that blue lizard-thing in the bubble!

I am sure that in months from now, there will be a new greatest invention ever, but this takes the cake...so far :) Have a great weekend everyone!

Woohoo, summers by the beach...here we come!!

2008-08-12T15:52:00.006-04:00

Well, the first set of big news is that my parents bought a beach house!! Apparently, they want to be near their grandchildren or something and figured that although they are only a short flight away, that was just not close enough to their most favorite (and only, mind you) grandsons!! And as excited as I am about this news, I have a feeling that my parents, well, my mom in particular is even more excited...

You see, my mom was born and raised on Long Island, NY and grew up living near the beach and all it had to offer. And although she moved away many, many years ago (no that was NOT a dig at her age!!), she has never lost her love for the ocean, and has in fact, passed on her love of all things "beachy" to me. In all the locations that I have lived in my life, I have never been very close to the water, I could always drive to it, but I wouldn't say I lived on or near the water once in my life...but yet, I have such an affinity for the ocean and the whole lifestyle that the beach propagates. This is so true that I refuse to let myself be "land-locked" and will not live in a state that is not touching the ocean somewhere. Living in Pittsburgh was as far as I ever wanted to be from the water, and although Lake Erie is huge and feels like an ocean, it's just not quite the same thing.

And while I thank my mother for giving me such a preference for the ocean, I was also so secretly jealous that she had the childhood growing up on the the water that I never had. Here she was telling me how fabulous it was to live near the ocean, but I never got to experience it for myself (Good ole Newark, DE didn't have much in the way of an oceanic lifestyle, meaning it didn't have ANY) in the way that she did. My mom always made sure we went on beach vacations, but it just wasn't the same as that idyllic childhood she had recited to me about clam digging and fishing when she was a kid and life guarding when she was older.

But now I owe my mom a big fat THANK YOU, because now my boys will have the experiences that she once did...and I can live vicariously through them, since that's what parents do :) So, although the boys don't know the magnitude of this exciting opportunity, I am glad they won't need to...living by the beach is going to just be part of their childhood and memories just like it was with my mom. What a wonderful gift to give your grandchildren, memories that will last long into their old age, thanks Mom :)

So, here are some pictures of our new digs...hopefully, I am not jinxing anything by posting this, so everyone please send good house inspection vibes our way!

Front of the House
Side of the house that faces the ocean
Back of the house, on the deck
View of the ocean from upstairs
Our Beach (he he, love saying that!)

I am so looking forward to having lots of visitors, so please clear your calendars for next summer...we got some beachin' to do!

Happy 5 Months, Boys!!

2008-08-11T18:34:00.005-04:00

I cannot get over that my little guys are 5 months old!! There is so much to tell, but since my boys are keeping me busy, it will have to wait another day. They are starting to look like little boys now and less like little babies...I can really see it now! Here are some outtakes from our photo shoot because as you can guess, getting one good shot of the two of them was not easy!

So stay tuned for some news-filled posts, because these guys have sure been keeping us busy!

And I thought getting out of the house was fun!

2008-08-05T11:25:00.006-04:00

I remember the days when both boys were finally home after 7 weeks, how excited I was to have them home and how even more excited I was to take them out and show them off (and even if I didn't want to show them off, there was really no choice on my part - see freak show post below). Well, fast forward three months to the present day and you will see that my excitement in taking them out has been replaced with pure disdain.

Now, it's never easy getting a newborn out of the house, and most new moms will attest to this. And, I bet you can imagine how much harder it is to get out of the house on time with not one infant, but TWO which can be tremendously difficult. You're still getting used to the idea of getting not only yourself out of the door, but also another (or more, in MOMs cases) tiny human being. Who in fact needs so much stuff, you may as well be packing yourself for a week-long vacation! So the shear fact that you can get out of the door no more than an hour after you anticipated is an impressive feat in and of itself in the first few months.

After a few months of practice most people are able to adjust to the fact that their new baby (or babies!) takes x amount of additional time. Say you want to leave at noon and you know that you would need 1 hour to get ready previously to having the baby, now you give yourself two hours of prep time (of which the baby takes up 1 hour and 55 minutes of that time, because of course, you never have an hour to get ready anymore, you are lucky if your shoes match and your hair doesn't look like you just got out of bed!) because you have learned after the 50th time of being late somewhere that you need to start earlier! And at this point, I have annoyed myself with my tardiness since I was a very punctual person pre-babies!!

Well, in my case, we pretty much have an idea of how long it is going to take to get us and the boys ready and out the door in a timely fashion. We even arrive pretty close to on time (plus or minus 5 minutes, you gotta give us that now!) for any and all appointments. But what blows my mind more than anything now, is how stressful it is to get out of the house. Whether we are going for a walk or to meet people for drinks...it is the most draining experience of my life! And this happens on almost a daily basis now, and will be daily when Matt goes back to work at the end of the month. You would think it would get easier, but it never does and I am convinced that just the act of leaving the house will drive me to an early grave. Here is a typical getting ready scenario, say we have to be out of the house by 12:00 for our "appointment":

10:00AM Announce that I am taking a shower, hubby proceeds to watch boys
10:15AM Take Shower (after catching up on email, which I can never do at home)
10:30AM Make-up, hair, & Pick out clothes to wear (which won't go on my body until 11:55)
10:45AM Take over baby watching duty so hubby can shower & shave
11:00AM Feed Babies
11:30AM Pick out clothes for babies to wear, make sure that babies are finished spitting up
11:35AM Change baby #1 into their going-out outfit
11:36AM Take off outfit because baby #1 has spit up all over himself before a bib could be put in place
11:37AM Put on going-out outfit #2 and remember to put on bib once outfit is pulled over head
11:40AM Put baby #1 on floor gym/swing/jumparoo to occupy while dressing baby #2
11:42AM Change baby #1 bib because he has proceeded to soak it with projectile spit-up
11:45AM Baby #2 changed and ready, placed with baby #1 to play
11:46AM Check to make sure diaper bag is fully stocked with 10 back ups for everything
11:48AM Check car seats to make sure each one is equipped with spit-rag, binkie, and blanket
11:50AM Hubby & I change into our real clothes
11:55AM Place baby #1 & baby #2 into car seats - screaming commences
11:56AM Hubby has to change shirt because one or both babies projectile spit-up on him
11:58AM Take babies out to car - screaming finally stops when they are moved
11:59AM Lucy escapes out the front door, hubby goes after her, I put babies in the car
12:05PM Lucy is caught and returned home
12:08PM I am about to go crazy in car because babies refuse to stop screaming
12:10PM We pull out of the driveway!!

This is pretty much the average situation that we have to endure just to get out of the house. It is simply the most stressful, emotionally draining thing I have to do. And if we do manage to get out of the house on time, we are still so stressed from the activity that we are not on speaking terms for the first 5 minutes of the car ride! I exaggerate, but thankfully we are taking it in stride and only about 25% of the time are we not speaking to each other...which means 75% of the time we make a great team!

It amazes me more and more how much children change your life. I remember the days when if Matt and I wanted to get out of the house, we just went (sure there were at least 10 wardrobe changes then, but that is just par for the course!) and could be wherever we need to be! Thanks to our boys, this is a much more challenging exercise than I ever thought possible. So, please be patient with us...we have every intention of getting there, it just might take a little longer now!!

Ummm….What??

2008-07-31T08:47:00.009-04:00

A posting on another blog got me thinking…Baby Cheapskate posted asking the readers what they thought the most worthless items were. And of course some people’s junk is another person’s treasure (yeah, I couldn’t have been able to live without my boppys (or is it boppies??) when feeding my boys alone, yet this was one of the most repeated things on the “worthless list”) but one of the posters sent a link to this baby gadget:

The Babykeeper

Maybe this is useful, but due to the shear comedy of the picture I just cannot fathom using such an item! I mean, look at those poor children…they’re already getting their first taste of what a future wedgie experience will be (and I have a feeling these poor kids will be getting wedgies with parents who feel the need to torture their child like this!). Come on that poor little girl just looks so perplexed…”Mommy, why am I hanging from a door??” And really, what if some jerk decides to unhook the "keeper" from the other side while mommy (or daddy, but I doubt daddy would do this) is taking care of nature??

So this got me thinking…what are the whackiest baby items out there?? In this day and age of “My baby MUST have the best/newest/coolest thing!!”, I figured there has got to be a TON of crazy must-have items in internet land. And, as you can guess, I was NOT disappointed:

The Baby Toupee

I really have no words for this, and it really doesn't need any, but seriously?? You're going to spend over $20 on a BABY TOUPEE...what the hell is wrong with you?? Who on earth would want their baby to look like Lil Kim??

Maloles Greek Sandals

So, I'm guessing you think they are cute...well of course they are, they are teeny tiny versions of Greek-style sandals!! What is not so cute is that they cost....wait for it...$100.00, and that is reduced from $160.00!! I won't spend that much money on my own sandals!! Well, to be fair, my only shopping option for sandals is usually Target and they don't sell anything above 20 bucks.

Ninetonine Zebra Crib

Is this a crib or a hutch for bunnies? Imagine your child having the mother of all tantrums and hitting his or her noggin off the back of the crib, YEOWCH!!

Non-Skid Socks for Infants

So, can someone inform me...why on earth do babies under, say 12 months need non-skid socks?? How much walking do newborns do? I understand my boys are preemies and are a little behind on stuff, but come on! I have heard of no baby under 9 months old that trots around the house so much that there is a significant need for non-skid socks.

Well, although there are so many more crazy things I could list, I think I will stop here. I'm sure everyone is now racing to buy all of these must-have items, especially the Donald Trump baby Toupee!! But you will have to fight me off first!

Apparently I'm an onion!

2008-07-30T08:43:00.003-04:00

OK, so I blatantly stole this from another MOM (thank you, BlueLadyBug77) and decided that it would be nice to delve a little bit into me as a person, not just a MOM. So apparently we all have 9 layers and I will unravel them the best that I can....and hopefully it won't bring tears to anyone's eyes (go ahead and roll your eyes at that one, lol!)

LAYER ONE:

Name: Amber
Birth date: October 7th
Birthplace: Buffalo, NY Current Location: MA
Eye Color: Blue
Hair Color: Red
Height: 5′6
Righty or Lefty: Righty
Zodiac Sign: Indecisive Libra - Fits me to a T

LAYER TWO:

Your heritage: I'm a mutt, but mostly Irish, English, German and a wee bit o' French
The shoes you wore today: Black Ballet Flats from Target (woohoo Target shoes!)
Your weakness: Sweet stuff, especially chocolate
Your fears: Something terrible happening to the boys while I sleep
Your perfect pizza: Pear, Gorgonzola, & thyme pizza, but anything from ZA!
Goal you’d like to achieve: To maintain my sanity at least until the boys turn 1

LAYER THREE:

Your most overused phrase on AIM: Hmm..no AIM but I am forever saying BTW on email & texts
Your first waking thoughts: Are the babies ok?
Your best physical feature: My eyes since pregnancy has ruined "the girls"
What you miss the most: having money to burn and no responsibilities

LAYER FOUR:

Pepsi or Coke: Coke in the can (I'll take coke zero too, it's delicious!)
McDonald’s or Burger King: Neither, no fast food thanks (but I'll take a diet coke frosty float from Wendy's)
Single or group dates: I love group dates...our friends are fun!
Adidas or Nike: can I say sketchers??
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: As long as lipton means real iced tea
Chocolate or vanilla: Chocolate all the way
Cappuccino or coffee: Macchiato for me, please!

LAYER FIVE:

Smoke: Nope
Cuss: Only when very angry...or driving
Sing: I do, but I shouldn't :)
Take a shower everyday: Actually, pretty much now...thanks to going back to work and the gym!
Do you think you’ve been in love: I know I have been in love!
Want to go to college: Been there and done that, but would love to do it again!
Liked high school: Had a blast!
Want to get married: Nope, Matt forced me :)
Believe in yourself: Most of the time
Get motion sickness: If I read in the car
Think you’re attractive: I used to be :(
Think you’re a health freak: I am trying my darndest!
Get along with your parent(s): Yep, they rock!
Like thunderstorms: As long as I am safe and sound they are fun to watch!
Play an instrument: The clarinet, for like five seconds

LAYER SIX: In the past month…

Drank Alcohol: I am making up for 9 months of lost time...
Smoked: Nope
Done a drug: Does Advil count?
Made out: Sure, but it's not quite as frequent as it was when I was younger :)
Gone on a date: Nope, never been on one, just ended up knocked up with the first stranger I met!
Gone to the mall: Well, we were parked at the mall, but went to the Cheesecake Factory
Eaten an entire box of Oreos: By myself, no - with an accomplice, yes
Eaten sushi: Yep, yep...yummy delicious!
Been on stage: Not in the past month
Been dumped: Oh sure, we threaten to divorce each other all the time, lol!
Gone skating: Not quite cold enough in July to do that!
Made homemade cookies: Actually, I have...impressed??
Gone skinny dipping: Not recently :)
Dyed your hair: Nope, and it's due!
Stolen anything: My husband's heart?? Ha ha

LAYER SEVEN: Ever…

Played a game that required removal of clothing: Of course
If so, was it mixed company: Of course
Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: Does this need to be explained? I did go to "ZooMass!"
Been caught “doing something”: I plead the fifth
Been called a tease: sure, but not in a bad way
Gotten beaten up: not that I can recall!
Shoplifted: A pack of gum when I was 7, I still feel guilty about it to this day!
Changed who you were to fit in: Who didn't when they were young and dumb?

LAYER EIGHT:

Age you hope to be married: 25 - and my dreams came true!
Numbers and Names of Children: Joshua & Broderick
Describe your Dream Wedding: Take my wedding and put it in Maui...that would have been the only thing to make it better, oh and if it was free!
How do you want to die: Without Pain
Where you want to go to college: Salve Regina...um, hello, your dorm room is in a mansion!
What do you want to be when you grow up: I am not sure yet...personal chef, maybe
What country would you most like to visit: Italy, France, Ireland, Greece, and Australia are all tied for 1st

LAYER NINE:

Number of people I could trust with my life: Dunno - but I trust my husband and family totally
Number of CDs that I own: A Bunch
Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper: None that I know of!
Number of scars on my body: Too Many - appendectomy scar, c-section scar, 3 bunion scars, a bunch of knee surgery scars, and then the scars from growing up
Number of things in my past that I regret: I try not to regret anything, but I am sure there are a few things I would change if I could.

Well, maybe you learned something new about me and maybe you didn't...but at least it wasted some time for me at work :) And here is a pic of the boys because there is no way I should have more than 3 posts of no babies!!!

Step Right Up...

2008-07-29T16:06:00.008-04:00

And feast your gaze upon a wonder that surpasses all wonders! This is something so new and fabulous you will not believe your very own eyes. TWINS!! And not only twins but twin boys at that! For a bargain price of $5 each, you too can touch these amazing marvels....

Really, is that what people think when they see us out in public?? That we are this amazing freak show that has never been witnessed before?? All kidding aside, that is truly how I feel when we take the boys out. I try and believe that all those stares are not for us, but for something truly amazing that is happening behind us. But when I turn around, sadly there is no one behind us spitting fire, just more interested onlookers. I am not the type of person that particularly enjoys being the center of attention, (looking beautiful in a big white wedding dress excluded, of course), so all this blatant fascination is quite foreign and awkward for me.

It is amazing how much time onlookers can take up when we are out and about with the boys. A simple run to Target turns into a complicated shopping trip in which I am dodging the gawkers at every corner! And believe me, I understand that twins are cool and very exciting, but I am not the first person they've seen with twins and nor will I be the last. I have noticed that this unearned attention occurs in three different levels:

1) Gawker From Afar - These are the people that don't say anything to you, but stop in their tracks once they see the twins. Usually, they will do a double-take and if they are with another person, will whisper to them. I usually hear "Oh look, it's twins" under their breath as they walk away.

2) Short but Sweet Gawker - These are the people that see the twins in public and say congratulations in passing. Usually, the exchange goes something like this: "Twins? Wow, they are gorgeous! Two Boys? What a blessing, congratulations!!". And since I am, of course, the mother to the two cutest boys on the planet, I usually don't mind this exchange at all. It's quick and to the point and lets me remember how lucky I am.

3) The World Must Stop, it's Twins Gawker - These are the people who give all the other gawkers a bad name. Not only do they stop you in your tracks, but the proceed to ask about ten million questions, most of which are very personal. The exchange with these people usually goes like this: "OH MY GOD, ARE THOSE TWINS?!?! WOW!! Do twins run in your family? Are they natural? Did you get a c-section, because those look like c-section babies! Well, now you have two boys, when are you going to try for that girl??" It feels like I've been accosted when I'm done talking to these people and I don't mean literally, but sometimes they do reach out to touch them, and I try my best not to cringe and go into psycho protective mommy mode. It always boggles my mind the nerve of some of these peoples questions and/or comments, and just makes me realize how crude the general public can be.

Finally, there is a subcategory that can fit into any of the above gawker-types and that is from other MOMs (Mothers of Multiples), who ironically I could talk to all day, since I am fascinated by their twins and the fact that they are still alive and seemingly sane. I mean, the fact that they are out and about and functioning in public is a good sign, right?? These people are always more than welcome to stop and take up my time since I am always eager to learn that there is indeed "a light at the end of the tunnel" or "that it gets easier, I swear!"

Believe me, like any other proud mom, I do enjoy (to an extent) the attention my boys receive. They are in fact the bestest most cutest little guys in the world and I am glad that the general public agrees. But, please don't treat us like a freak show, because in fact, it is stressful enough getting out into public with two infants, I don't want to feel like I am in a fishbowl as well!! Just imagine how you would feel, walking into the grocery store or Target and being stopped and asked questions every step of the way "Oh wow, your a GIRL, that is sooo AMAZING, are your boobs natural??" or "MOM LOOK OVER HERE...that girl dyes here hair, lets go see!!".

We all deserve some peace when we brave the outside world, whether with kids or not :)

Hey, who is that guy??

2008-07-25T10:48:00.004-04:00

As any mom of twins know, the first time they actually notice each other is greatly anticipated. I mean, here are my two little guys that never stopped kicking and punching each other inside my belly (believe me, they never stopped as I probably have permanent internal bruises from them!), yet have absolutely no idea of each other's existence since they've joined the world! How bizarre is that?!?

And in conjunction with the great anticipation of twins finally noticing each other, come the great anticipation of the day that they can entertain each other, which means that mommy and/or daddy can cut down on the three ring circus act that needs to be used to occupy them in between their feedings. Oh what a happy day that must be, right up there with holding their own bottles and potty training!

Strangely, I just assumed that one day they would just notice each other and that would be all that was needed to rekindle that womb relationship they had going. But nope, it's been a much more gradual process than that. At first, they would kinda glance at the "other guy" once and a while if said baby was in their line of vision. Then they actually started to look at each other, noticing there was another person there that was not mommy or daddy or any other adult for that matter. And now, they have graduated to full on eye contact with each other for several seconds at a time and have even been able to have a conversation in that oh so adorable baby babbling. And sadly, while it is not as earth shattering as I thought it would be (they'd do fist pumps, giggle and roll off into the sunset), it sure is entertaining to see the transition.

Although it might be awhile until they can fully interact and entertain each other, it sure is fun to watch them noticing the "other guy". They get these looks on their faces that seem to say "Whoa, mom did you see that guy? Who the heck is that?? He looks just like me!" What a riot it will be to hear them speak in their own twin speak about stuff we'll never understand. Just another crazy cool thing about having twins :)

My Birth Story - Part 2

2008-07-23T08:21:00.009-04:00

Onto part 2...

Ok, to recap a bit; So there I am in the bathroom of my hospital room having just pulled the red emergency lever after a long debate with myself. Remembering the nurses telling me "That's the one you pull if you really want service quickly", immediately I had two nurses rush into my bathroom asking me if I was OK and in an incredulous voice I told them "Um, I think my water broke". They told me to get up, and yes indeed, I still had the mighty Mississippi flowing out of me, so thankfully I didn't look like a big liar to them. The nurses were in full agreement and ushered me back to my bed so they could get a listen to the babies' heart rates on that dreaded monitor.

Knowing that this could be the last time I had to be on that thing, I was so thrilled. After being in the hospital for almost 3 weeks and having to have a non stress test (NST) everyday, sometimes more the once a day was the most excruciatingly annoying tedious process of my entire bed rest experience. Not only did I have to sit absolutely still on my back for 20 minutes (which is damn near impossible since the babies press on your vein and causes you to black-out) but it took the nurses at least 20-30 minutes just to find the babies on their heart rate monitors. And of course the boys would never stay on the monitors as long as was needed to read the NST correctly, so they would either make me go through it all over again, ugh, or bring in the ultrasound machine and conduct a biophysical profile (bpp). This was a lot more fun for me because not only did it take less that 5 minutes usually to get what they were looking for (practicing breathing, kicking and moving arms, heart rate) but I got to see my little boys up on the screen. I just didn't understand why they made me go through all the torture of NSTs when they could just do it quickly with a bpp, but who knows I don't make the rules. I was just glad of the prospect of never having to be on that machine again!

Thank God the boys were actually very cooperative and were located right away on the monitor. The resident that was assigned to my floor also had come in joking with me about not waiting for him to show up to have my water break. One thing I have to say is that the doctors & residents at Tufs were phenomenal. They were always so nice to me and kept me updated on my pre-eclampisa and always made me feel well cared for. If I am ever pregnant again, I will go there thanks to my wonderful experience with the staff.

So, here I am surrounded by this flurry of activity and I am in the process of calling my husband. Since it was around 7AM, I knew Matt would be on his way to work, so when I called and got his voicemail I was a little concerned. After trying to call him over 15 times I was started to get very pissed off! Here I was, with all these doctors and nurses around me discussion my imminent c-section and I can't get ahold of my damn husband. I called his parents, I called the school (in which no one answered at ten past seven in the morning which was very strange to me), I called my parents telling them all to hunt him down and let him know, oh by the way your wife is going to have babies today!!

Finally, Matt called me back after what seemed like a lifetime, but in reality was more like a half hour. Turns out that he thought it would be a good idea to go to the gym at his school before work and that not bringing a phone would be an even better idea. So after asking what the hell he was thinking, he rushed over to the hospital and was there in like 10 minutes flat. I don't care if he works in Malden or not, there is no way he drove at a safe speed to get from Malden to Boston in 10 minutes, no matter what he says :)

Turns out Baby A's (Joshua) water broke, so by 9AM they are starting to prep me for my surgery and I am wheeled into the OR. Now, I've had a few surgeries in my life (7 including the c-section) but I've never been wheeled into an OR completely awake and sober. I am usually on my way to being very drugged up on some nice pre-operation stuff which makes me nice and loopy. Needless to say, I couldn't get over how bright and cold the room was. And I was wearing a tissue-thin hospital gown that did nothing to warm me or cover my ginormous belly! So I am showing off my huge ass to the whole operating room which was now filled to the gills with "teams" of people. There was the anaesthesia team, the delivery team, the nurse team, the baby A team and the baby B team. I don't know how many people were in there, but Matt counted at least 14 in the room at one time! And here I am in all my fat, pregnant glory with water pouring out of me like I was a leaky dam or something. I mean really, how much water can be in that belly??

Then they make me walk from the stretcher over to the operating table all the while I am dripping away which for some reason was very embarrassing to me to do in front of all these people. I'm guessing I had the "peeing in front of people" complex, when in fact, there was nothing I could do nothing to control it! Once I hopped up (well, maybe not hopped, I did gain 60lbs for this pregnancy) on the table, they started getting my spinal block ready. For anyone who hasn't had a spinal block, it was very bizarre because from my chest down I couldn't feel a damn thing. It took all of 1 minute to start working and then they were off to deliver these babies!

If I had any shred of modesty remaining from my 3 week stay in the hospital, it was now gone. They took the tiny piece of fabric that was called a hospital gown and proceeded to use it as a curtain to shield me from "the show" which I couldn't have been more thankful for, but at the same time I was now completely and utterly naked in front of at least 14 people. And it would have been one thing if I was in my pre-wedding body, but nope, I was a full fledged beached whale.

After the initial shock of my entire naked body being on display faded, the time just seemed to fly by. Although I couldn't feel it, I could see my body thrashing about from the doctors trying to pull the babies from my body. What a creepy feeling that is...to not feel the tugging, but to see it...it still gives me the willies to think about it. And not even a half hour after arriving in the OR, Joshua Edward was born at 9:34AM. I could hear his little cries and it melted me. And as far as I know, he was whisked off to baby A team to get evaluated. Then three minutes later at 9:37AM little Broderick Christopher was born. He was a little more quiet at first, but then his cries too filled the room and I was filled with absolute elation. Before they were taken off to the NICU we were able to see the boys and spend a little "alone time" with them which was so nice. I couldn't get over how calm and quiet they both were, just looking around and taking it all in. It is a moment in time I will never forget!

Thank you for taking the time to read this, I am sure it wasn't the most exciting of stories, but I felt it needed to be recorded so that one day when I am older, I can tell the boys how they came into the world because I know that I sure won't remember it, thanks to a little thing called momnesia...it's this affliction that allows the human race to continue because if women truly remembered what they went through to have a child, they would most likely never do it again!

My Birth Story - Part 1

2008-07-22T10:48:00.010-04:00

Well, most girls that I have seen start off their new parent blogs with either a BFP (Big Fat Positive, as in pregnancy test) story or the Birth Story. And since that would make perfect sense, I of course did not do it that way :) I only actually started my blog once the boys were born and in the NICU and long after finding out I was pregnant. So, I have decided to post all these previous stories for posterity. So I will be starting with the day that Josh & Brody made their grand entrance over four months ago!! Hopefully I can remember as many details as possible since although, I no longer have pregnancy brain, it has now progressed to mommy brain which is a far worse affliction :) First a little back story, but I am warning you, it's not for the squeamish:

Tuesday March 11, 2008 - 34 Weeks

Well I woke up around the same time that I do everyday while being on bed rest at the hospital - between 6-7 in the morning. Usually, it is the Dr. that is assigned to the floor that wakes me up at the start of their shift which is about 7AM, but on other occasions it has been the crazy Dracula lady that takes my blood. I kid you not, she talks in a Romanian accent and says "I've come to collect your bluuuud" and then proceeds to turn on every bloody light in my room turning into the surface of the sun all at 6AM. This time I woke up on my own, my stupid bladder was calling to me, as it did every 2-3 hours and waddled to the bathroom. Since it was almost 7AM I knew I was in for the deluge of the beginning of the shift visitors - The doctor assigned to the floor, the nurse assigned to me to take my blood pressure, the cleaning lady, the Dracula people....so I decided to turn on the TV and not be scared awake like I usually am.

I actually feel rested thanks to the ambien the lovely 3rd shift nurse gave me at 11PM. Ambien is pretty hit or miss for me, well at least the pregnant me, because sometimes no matter how tired I was or how late I took the ambien, I still would get up at least twice a night to either use the bathroom facilities or to roll over. Yep, you heard that right...I woke myself up rolling over because it was such an absolute process, probably very similar to how a baby first rolls over - more in quarter turns than one fluid motion.

So I am awake and almost fully rested and very happy that I had made it to 34 weeks. Tuesdays were my week change day, so I always looked forward to them more so than I ever did when not pregnant. 34 weeks was such a great milestone for us since I had been sent to Tufts at 31 weeks and 5 days thanks to pre-term labor. I'll never forget being transferred in the Ambulance from Lowell General to Tufts since Lowell wasn't equipped to deliver babies before 32 weeks. I think I was in complete denial at first of the possibility of delivering my twins so early, but once we got to Labor & Delivery and received the first round of steroid shots to develop the boys' lungs and got "the talk" from the NICU doctor (anyone having pre-term babies can understand that conversation) about the consequences of delivering babies of my gestation, I realized this is a real and very scary possibility!! No, I was not ready to deliver yet! My boys were too small still and I needed to keep them inside me to continue to develop like they should!!

Thankfully, I did not deliver the babies on that day, but I was dialated to 3cm and needed to stay in the hospital for the duration of my pregnancy, however long that would be. It was a scary position to be in, but I knew it was best for me and the babies so I would do what had to be done. So, for the next few weeks I made the antipartum/postpartum floor my home. All of my wonderful friends and family visited me and for that I am forever grateful because I think I would have gone mad if my only interaction was with the nurses coming to check my blood pressure or the babies heart rates. I mean I think the poor cleaning lady was sick of hearing me talk!!

On top of my lovely pre-term labor symptoms, I was also lucky enough to get pre-eclampsia. For people who aren't familiar with pre-eclampsia, it is a condition that only pregnant woman get which causes high blood pressure and severe swelling. In my case my blood pressure was high, but not ever high enough to cause concern for seizures or needing to take the babies quickly. But my swelling was so vicious that you would think I weighed 450lbs from the ankles down. My poor feet were so swollen that I could barely fit into the XXL hospital socks they had for me. I mean I already felt fat enough as it is, let alone all the water I was retaining!

So for once, I felt pretty darn good...I had made it to 34 weeks which is pretty darn good with twins since on average twins are born at 36 weeks. So I only had 2 more weeks to go, I could do this, I really could. I made it this far, what was another 2 weeks...right??

Well, the babies had other ideas because as soon as I got back into bed after my bathroom break, turned on the TV, I rolled over to take sip 10,005 of water that I needed to drink. As soon as I did that ::GUSH:: And all this water just fell out of me!! It was really one of the most bizarre feelings I had ever had, just like I completely lost all control of my bladder and the boys' decided to practice their drop-kicks on it. I knew it was my water, because really, my bladder was barely the size of a pea by now and I just knew it. Women who have had babies always say "Oh, you'll know when your water breaks, trust me" and as long as it isn't a slow leak, you will most definitely know!!

Now I'm thinking "Oh shit my water just broke" and I'm sitting in my very soggy bed (which now I know why the mattresses are all plastic, it makes for hot sleeping but easy cleanup!) thinking what do I do now?? So, I waddle over to the bathroom, as quickly as a 8.5 month pregnant lady with twins can move, all the while I feel like I am peeing rivers from my pants and I am leaving puddles to prove it. And I'm sitting in the bathroom staring at the red emergency pull cord next to the toilet. "Do I pull the handle? Well, my water broke didn't it....what if it didn't and I look like an ass that pulled the emergency lever? Dammit, lake superior is coming out of me in gushes, I'm pulling that lever!"

I think that this post has been long enough...stay tuned for part 2 and the actual arrival of my boys!

Happy 30th Birthday Matt!!

2008-07-21T08:04:00.003-04:00

Well, it's official...I am married to an old man :) My dear husband turned 30 today and I am still a spry 29, even if it is only for three more months!!

And how does he get to spend it?? Not waking up in San Francisco and going to bed in Maui like for his 26th birthday, nope, he'll be lucky if he can go to the bathroom when he wants because he is spending his 30th birthday with the boys. And as wonderful as our boys are, I feel badly that there really isn't any pomp and circumstance for his big 3-0. He deserves a kick ass party with all the stops, but unfortunately for us, money is not on our side this year.

So maybe next year instead of celebrating his 31st birthday, we'll celebrate the 1st anniversary of his 30th birthday and have that blowout that he deserves.

Enjoy your day, my love...as I have a feeling these birthday will start coming even more fast and furious than they once have.

Happy Anniversary to Us!

2008-07-17T06:55:00.009-04:00

Well, four years ago today I married my best friend. As canned as that sounds (completely agree with you, Molly) it is completely true! Matt & I have been together for 8 years now, and although it hasn't always been champagne and roses, we've had a wonderful time. And we have always "done it up" for our anniversary:

1st anniversary - Celebrated in Las Vegas

2nd anniversary - Celebrated in Key West

3rd anniversary - Celebrated in Bermuda (thank you Matt & Molly!)

4th anniversary - To be celebrated in Lowell

Hey, there's a lot to like about Lowell, right?? As much as I would love to go someplace fun to celebrate our 4-year anniversary, it's just not in the cards this year. It's amazing how quickly priorities change when a baby (or babies, in my case) comes along. I'm not saying you should stop your life or anything like that, but life is different whether we want it to be or not. In our case, since I was on maternity leave we just can't afford that romatic getaway this year. That gives me a whole year to think of something fabulous for our 5 year anniversary, which I plan on doing!!

And in reality, I'm just not quite ready to leave my boys for an extended period of time, anyway. It's bad enough I hardly see them during the week now that I am back at work, so any time off this year will consist of spending time with my men, all three of them!

Thanks, babe, for a wonderful 4 years of marriage. You are my husband, the father of my children, my best friend, my rock, my bad influence, my partner in crime, my love, my good time, my everything. It's been a wild ride so far, and with our new additions, I'm sure this is only the beginning. I couldn't imagine my life without you and hope that I never have to. I love you with all my heart and can never thank you enough for the wonderful gifts that you have given me, our boys!!

Professional Photos

2008-07-16T10:15:00.015-04:00

Well, here is one of the perks of going back to work...one of my friends and coworkers has just graduated from photography school and was willing to take some pictures of the boys free of charge!! I was so thrilled when she offered to do it and am even more thrilled now that I have the pictures. She did such a wonderful job!! And I am hoping that she can use the photos for her portfolio, so it's a win-win situation. I will post some of my favorites, but if you want more of the Gillis Boys I'll be happy to email them or send you a CD (yes mom, I will send you a CD).

As you will notice (or maybe not if you can't quite tell them apart) is that Josh refused to be the smiley laid-back guy he usually is and decided to be fussy cry-baby. And Brody decided he would be a little ham. There aren't too many great pics of them together, so maybe when they get a bit older...enjoy!!

This is Skyla, our 9 month old neice...gorgeous!

Like a Flash

2008-07-13T15:25:00.007-04:00

Um, can someone stop fast-forwarding my life?? Where on earth did the past 4 months go?? I swear, God has me on his giant Tivo up in heaven and is fast-forwarding my life by one arrow (you'll understand if you have tivo) thinking that I wouldn't notice...but I have and now I want to slow down a bit, thank you very much!!

Unfortunately, this is the best shot that I could manage with my boys. Not for lack of trying, I think I took at least 15 pictures, but for whatever reason the boys just turn fussy when the camera is on. I'm not sure why, but they could be Mr. Giggles all day but as soon as that first flash goes off, that is the end of the happy babies. And on top of that, once Lucy sees the flash, she is compelled to summon her inner ham and plant herself into every photo! It is too cute and makes for some really funny photos:

And then the boys cannot manage to keep one item of clothing clean for the picture shoot either, so Lucy makes sure she is on spit-up clean up duty as well:

Needless to say, their monthly picture are not the most calming of experiences and they usually leave us tired and frustrated at doing it in the first place. Thank goodness these posed "shots" are only once a month or I think I would shoot myself!

But now looking at the photos, it just boggles my mind that our little boys are 4 months old now! I mean seriously, I can still remember sitting in the doctor's office with Matt for my first visit and the looks on our faces when she said "Oh my, there's two in there!" Not only were we shocked, but we were terrified wondering how on earth would we manage to take care of two babies!!! Not only are we taking care of them, but they are thriving!

Surprise of all surprises, our little Brody now weighs more than Josh! Josh weighs in at 12lbs 5oz and Brody is 12lbs 10oz! They have more than tripled their birth weights and we couldn't be more pleased! Of course I am sure they look small next to a typical 4 month-old baby, but to us they are ginormous from what they used to be at just barely 4lbs. Here is a picture to compare:

So, although they might not be in the 90th percentile yet, they are well on their way to become the bruisers I know they will be!!

Another thing we learned at their 4 month appointment...they are now allowed to try rice cereal! Since they are both holding their heads up well, he says it is something they are ready for as long as they are holding their heads up....But no one asked me if I was ready for it!
Well, Amber, are you ready for your baby boys to start on solids?? Hell no!

And I understand we don't have to give them anything yet and it is actually recommended for them to start closer to 6 months or when they show interest in food, but my point is that I am just not ready for this step yet! I'm just getting used to having babies and all the work and fun that goes into that, I am not ready for them to grow up yet! First it's rice cereal, next it'll be driver's licences! Ok, I know I may be overreacting, but not really. I mean at the rate my life is flying by, I'll be a grandmother before I know it!

But, as with anything, denial is the first step. And as far as I can remember, acceptance is the final step. So, while I have not quite accepted that my boys are old enough for solid food, I did in fact make a purchase at the grocery store for some rice cereal. Of course, I don't plan on giving it to them until they are 12, but it is there in case I allow acceptance to overthrow denial. In the meantime, I plan on pressing the pause button to enjoy my pre-solids babies a little longer.

"Hey, I've had them for two days...and they're still alive"

2008-07-09T11:29:00.011-04:00

This is the exact quote that my husband, Matt, said to me on Tuesday night at his mother's house when I arrived and learned that he had used up the emergency bottles and had no more diapers for the boys. It made me chuckle because I wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not. I mean I can't even kill a houseplant in two days and you are talking to a chick with two black thumbs (yes, indeed I have killed a cactus).

Before I start this story, I am by no means throwing my husband under the bus, more like having a laugh as his expense. He has been more than fabulous with the boys and is more than capable to take care of them. And someday very soon, he will be the boys' preference since I am sure he'll be the "cool parent" letting them eat candy and throw balls in the house :)

Let me back up a bit...Matt had decided to take the boys to his parents house on Day 2 of "daddy daycare" not because he is overwhelmed at watching them, but because it is obnoxiously oppressive here in MA and his parents have a bee-utiful brand new pool. I definitely couldn't blame him because a) a day by the pool is better than most any day AND b) he has built in help when going over there!

So the comedy of errors begins with the diaper bag. This is something that I have packed and ready to go on a moment's notice. It contains:

- one change of daytime clothes (rompers for the summer)

- one change of sleepers

- one change of onsies (in case it gets hot OR in case the boys have not two but THREE blowouts) for each child.

- 4 spit rags

- 2 receiving blankets (can be used for a multitude of applications)

- 6 Diapers (for 3 changes each)

- Container of Wipes

- 4 Emergency Binkies (there is not a worse thing in this world than a lost binkie)

- 2 Emergency Bottles (with powdered formula)

- 1 Emergency bottle of water (for above emergency bottles)

- 2 Emergency bottles of 2oz pre-made shelf stable formula (in case they run out of emergency full bottles of course)

Now I know this sounds like a lot of stuff, but it really isn't for two infants, and even more so, it is only packed for a 2 or 3 hour outing and not meant to be used for an entire day away from home. And it has tons of back-ups for the back-ups, but it still isn't meant to replace a well-packed "All Day Bag" that is usually filled to the gills with double of the above mentioned items. Well, poor Matt really didn't realize this and pretty much just took the bag, as is, to his mother's for an entire day away. Well needless to say, he used up the following items before I arrived:

- 5 of the 6 diapers

- Onsies

- Emergency Bottles

Of course this doesn't sound too bad, but the things he ran out of are the things that are the necessities of babies...food and diapers. He admitted to a blonde moment by only packing two bottles each, which is good for 6 hours if you are lucky. But in our experience we have learned that even if we are out for only a couple of hours we pack two bottles...if it is a longer outing we at least pack 3, cause you never know when the boys will be throwing of their schedule. So needless to say the Mother In Law formula stash was broken into along with the emergency bottles. Now, when I envisioned the use for said bottles it was not while at his mom's house because he had a blonde moment...it was for when we were stuck in horrible traffic or something on our way home and the boys were screaming and past due for their bottles. But hey, the term "emergency" is subjective.

Needless to say, yes my baby boys were still alive when I got home. Wet & out of emergency food, but still alive. Andthey have been since I started work which is great for me...since I did spend nine months and all growing them, I'd at least be able to keep them around for longer than any of my silly houseplants.

And now Matt knows what it's like to not go to the bathroom for the entire day...and he can appreciate that's all I wanted to do when he came home from work. Now it's his turn, knock yourself out honey...the bathroom is all yours!

Not Half Bad

2008-07-08T16:06:00.004-04:00

Those are the words I would have to use to describe my first day back to work...but the pessimist in me sees "Only Half Good". Of course how bad could my first day really go, I hadn't been there in 4 months so they couldn't throw me into anything too stressful in my first day just due to the fact that I am so far out of the loop on any project that I can't be held responsible for anything quite yet.

Phew, so the hardest part is now behind me, that dreaded first day back...and since it wasn't half bad, I am hoping that I get used this new me: Working Mom when I had just started getting used to being a Mom and on top of that a Mom of Twin Boys. That is a lot of new titles to get used to in a 4 month period!!

Speaking of Working Moms...I just doen't get that phrase one bit. I mean seriously if you are not a Working Mom then are you a Non-Working Mom?? Um, taking care of children is waaaaay more than work, the word just doesn't come close to explaining the sacrifice and dedication that is required to be a mom...but the title of Working Mom is very redundant to me and almost condescending to a point - DUH - being a mom is work! And a lot of work at that!! Not only do you have to struggle with 8,9, or even 10 hours of dealing with babies you have to go home to your children as well :)

I give all you working moms TONS of props...it ain't easy being us, and it sure as hell doesn't pay enough. I feel priveledge to be part of the club though and we'll see how successful I am! And hopefully the rest of my week will not be "Half Bad"

P.S. - I would like to personally thank our friend Rob for working so dillegently on such a genius picture :)

Parting is such sweet sorrow...

2008-07-06T16:18:00.006-04:00

Sigh...

The day I've been dreading since I found out I was pregnant is now less than 24 hours away...BACK TO WORK....

Honestly, I really just don't think I expect the day to ever arrive especially at the beginning of them joining the world. That was when my boys were in the NICU and I was home and the day could not come fast enough when they would join us. Each day just dragged by that I didn't have my boys home and that their setbacks were keeping them in longer. And then Brody came home, how exciting yet heartbreaking, one of our little boys was coming home while the other one stayed back to get stronger. And then the days didn't drag at all, but the time when BOTH my boys were home could not come soon enough! It was one of the worst times of my life when I had to feel like half a mother to both my boys, forever leaving one to go spend time with the other. Those 5 weeks were the most trying in my life and I honestly couldn't wait for them to be over. FINALLY the day I had been waiting for since March 11, both my baby boys were at home!! We could actually become a "normal" family, that is as normal as a family can be with two newborns :) Of course, Josh came home on an apnea monitor that he had to be on when he slept which made things a little abnormal for a while...and we all counted down the days until we could give that back.

And as did everything else, that time did pass as well and we were well on our way to become parents to typical newborns. It was harder than hard, tougher than tough, but well worth the journey. Now looking back, I realized that I so desperately wanted to get to the next stage of their recuperation that I was actually wishing away my time with them. And now 17 weeks later, what I wouldn't give to get that time back. Not to the time when they were so little and sick in their isolettes that were maintaining their temperature for them, or those damn feeding tubes that we hated as did the boys since they continued to rip them from their noses almost every day, lol. But to the days where they had just come home and we were just so excited to have two babies of our own. To the time where we were so sleep deprived that I was convinced I would never get a full night's rest again. What I wouldn't give to go back to the day where they both made their first coos and started smiling at just mommy and no one else. How quickly that time flew and dammit I won't get it back!!

I am so thankful for technology and for all the pictures we are able to get of our boys and be able to share with all of our friends and family at light speed. Gone are the days where you actually have to go get your film developed and man is that a Godsend since with twins, you are lucky to leave the house once a week!! I am so glad to have a continuous record of our boys growth and progress, from the time that they were so little I was petrified of holding them to now the pudgy little guys they have become. We have photographic evidence of what incredible fighters our Josh & Brody are and how far they have come.

Now, this time in their development they will spend with their dad, giving him all their smiles and coos. I am so thrilled that Matt will get to experience what I have had the privilege to experience over the past several months, and it will truly melt his heart and humble him at the same time as it did with me. But at the same time I am insanely jealous that he gets to have them all to himself as I once did...to be able to see their little personalities bloom and to see them discover that they are a twin and the joy of having another little person that is just like them! How on earth will I get any work done, knowing they are giggling at each other??

I will be glad to get to have some of my own time that is separate from my boys, and on top of that even get to eat or go to the bathroom when I please, not when they allow me :) I'll be able to have adult conversations that don't center around poo or spit up or any other type of bodily functions and will actually be able to use my brain for things other that figuring out how to do things with one hand or figuring out how to hold and calm two babies at once. It'll be nice to feel like a functioning adult with something to add to the workforce, yet at the same time, if I had the choice, I would stay home in a heartbeat. Not that I don't want to do all those things I mentioned, I just don't want to do it just yet...they are only this small for such a short while and I don't want to miss a thing.

And I will now leave this with a picture of my three men, only a precursor of what Matt will be teaching them in the future :) I need to end on a happy note because I've cried enough while typing this post and need something to make me smile...enjoy:

Houston, we have rollers!

2008-06-17T00:11:00.010-04:00

Sorry it has been so long since I updated this, but now that the boys are having more awake time, they are much more demanding which leaves very little time for me to do anything that I want say this blog, shower, eat, or even use the bathroom! I just realized that I had not one thing to drink today until 10 minutes ago when I just realized how parched I was...

Anyway, I am full of nothing but good news...it seams that things are finally looking up for us! It only took three months or so and that's not including the approximately 3 weeks I spent in the hospital before they were born. I am hoping now that things keep on going the right direction, and although I know it won't all be rainbows and puppies at least we now can be a "normal" family with newborn twins.

Well, the biggest good news we have is that Josh is officially off the monitor, woohoo!!! Friday was his last day and now him and his brother are sleeping in their big boy crib in their own room! Which means mom and dad should be able to sleep better at night! Apparently Josh never had a breathing issue since he came home 7 weeks ago, we all think he just needed to be home with us and his brother.

And good news #2 is that both boys have rolled over from tummy to their back, but the bad news is that I only have photographic evidence that Josh has rolled over...and it has nothing to do with the fact that Brody is the second child and will get the shaft...my brand new camera I bought in January knowing I would be taking ten thousand pictures of the boys is broken and I don't know why. The display screen is all blurry and the pictures taken are blurry on the computer so I'm not quite sure what is wrong, but I sent it back to the company and I am really hoping to get it back before their 4 month picture is due. It's bad enough I had to use a ::gasp:: disposable camera with ::double gasp:: actual film to take their 3 month photo which will now probably not be developed until they are one! I mean seriously, I'm lucky if I can get out of the house to check the mail, let alone go develop film! Anyway, here is the video of the big J-man doing his thing:

I apologize for the obnoxiously loud Today show, I swear I am not deaf, it's just that's how loud the TV needs to be for me to hear it above the cacophony of screaming babies and Fisher Price's greatest hits.

Thirdly, I also have photographic evidence that the boys smile!! That was hard enough to get, but happened on the same day as the "rollover-gate" so the baby milestone gods were smiling down on me (they must have read my blog). You'd think that these boys are never played with or acknowledged with how stingy they are with their smiles, but they are coming more frequently at least for me, their mother. One of the perks of not being able to drink for 9 (in my case 8) months, they at least smile at you first. Of course when good old "dada" leaves their mouths I will be in hysterics wondering what the hell their father did that could be so great that they will say his name first. So I'll take the mommy only smiles while I can get them since I am sure they will be hardcore flirts very soon :)

Here is Brody being a little ham:

And here is Josh, but his smiles were much harder to catch:

And finally, the boys are still SLEEPING THROUGH THE NIGHT!! It's been almost a week now and they go to bed around 11 and don't get up until 6 or 7!! Oh happy day! Of course I know that this is fleeting, but I will take what I can get for as long as I can get it! I'm sure once they start teething we'll be back in sleep deprivation hell, but for now I will nana nana boo boo it up!

Alright, I'm off to get some sleep cause as much as they sleep at night that means they do no sleeping during the day and I need to get my beauty rest so I can do the whole supermom thing all over again tomorrow. Not tooting my own horn, but have twins and then watch them alone for 8 hours for weeks on end and you'll feel like a supermom too!

One Step Forward...Two Steps Back

2008-05-28T21:42:00.007-04:00

Well, you know how they say "Karma is a bitch!"?? Well, THEY aren't kidding are THEY? In all honesty, I think I am being punished for being so witty. The universe is only allowing me to have a certain amount of "witty allowance" and I apparently overdrew my witty account...

And the over-draft charges, being my screaming bundles of joy, really suck!

That's what I get for putting nana nana boo boo out into the universe, and I kinda knew that, but I just didn't care, I was just so elated that the boys slept for several hours at a time! And it wasn't just a fluke, they did it again this weekend, but now I am paying the price...

The boys have gone on a sleep-protest. I'm not sure when they made their plans, but it's been a rough couple of days. I'm guessing when I was fast asleep thinking that they were fast asleep they made a pact with each other to slowly drive their mother insane. Not only are they not sleeping at night, or during the day for that matter, but while awake they have taken to screaming incessantly. And there is nothing quite like babies screaming in stereo. I said sleep deprivation should be a torture device, but if anyone really wants the goods from a POW, make sure they are good and sleep deprived and then unleash two screaming babies!!

I didn't know that two little guys could make so much noise, I mean they are preemies, shouldn't they have that "Oh it's so cute, they are crying" type of cry?? Nope, these are two seriously PISSED OFF babies making sure they let me know that I am ignoring them, in case I forgot. I mean it is so easy to forget that you have two impatient babies screaming bloody murder, really it is.

Just in case I was getting cocky about my parenting skills, this has definitely been a wake up call. Of course, I feel incredibly unsure of my ability and this episode has just reaffirmed my inadequacies. "Yes, big man upstairs, I realize that I know absolutely nothing about what I am doing, thank you ever so much for reminding me."

::Sigh::

They STTN!!

2008-05-23T10:22:00.004-04:00

Ok, so I know you guys are like "What the hell is STTN??, some strange new vaccine??". But it is an acronym on the message boards that I frequent and the one acronym that any new mom would KILL for...SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, my twin boys slept through the night, on the same night and at the same time...WOO freaking HOO!

Sleeping through the night is what I would consider the Holy Grail of early parenting...I understand that there will be much more important milestones later one, but in the first year, sleeping through the night is what all parents aspire for and what most don't get nearly enough of!

While I have only waited for this moment for 8 weeks, since Brody came home and coincidentally I started this blog, I realized how unattainable a goal it is, you know, with the odds stacked up against me; first of all I have 2 newborn babies, so even if I get one to STTN, there is still the other little guy to keep me up AND second of all, since they are preemies it will take them that much longer to get to the magic 12lb weigh, which is this mythical weight where STTN is possible! I knew I had very little hope reaching the Grail in the next 6 months.

But still, when I saw those posts on my message board....OMG my baby (singular, mind you) STTN!!!, or DC (dear child) STTN since he was 1 month old, I wanted to reach my hand into the computer screen and strangle these braggarts for being so selfish that they felt the need to torture us poor sleep-deprived souls in that "nana nana boo boo" sort of way. Just like those stick thin actresses say, "ooh I just eat what I want and I don't work out, my body is just this fabulous without any work"...shut-up be-otch! Of course in your heart of hearts you are uncontrollably envious of such an alien concept and would sell your soul to be in their shoes!

And here I am, NANA NANA BOO BOO - My twins STTN!! While I am not dumb enough to believe that for one second, this wasn't more than a fluke, I don't care! I have had a full 6 hours of sleep (oh, yeah BTW that is considered STTN, when in my reality it would be about 10 hours) and I feel like a new woman! I mean look at me, I am downright witty in this blog entry! Usually I am lucky if people can understand what I am writing with all my spelling/grammatical errors!!

But don't get used to the witty Amber, because as fast as she showed up, she will be swallowed up again only to be replaced by sleep-deprived-just-trying-to-survive Amber. Enjoy her while she lasts :)

Sweet Freedom!!

2008-05-17T08:55:00.004-04:00

Well, Matt and I had our first date since both of the boys came home. The inlaws offered to watch the little guys so we could go out to dinner at eat and feel a little more like normal human beings! For me, I am pretty much a prisoner in my house for most of my days...I mean I can take them out for a walk, but I have yet to master taking them both out, gulp, alone so getting out of the house is a big deal! Even bigger, I did my hair and make-up and I even TOOK A SHOWER.

On a side note, people that don't have kids yet, never ever take for granted the wonderfullness (yeah I know it's not a word) of a nice hot shower. I used to get one at least once sometimes twice a day! Now I am lucky if I get one once a week...pathetic, I know, but have a kid (or two in my case) and then judge me :)

Anyway, I was beside myself that I was able to look like a human being and go out and do human being things, like eating at the restaurant of my choice and not picking one because it has a booth big enough to fit 2 carseats. We ate at this new place in Lowell called The Blue Taleh for dinner. The food was good and the drinks were delicious, but in all honesty we could have gone to the 99, ok not really, but it was just nice to go out with my husband and wear real clothes. Never underestimate actual clothing, it is a fabulous thing!!

Needless to say we were back home and practically asleep before the clock struck 11:00, but what do you expect when we are only getting 3-4 hours a night?? We just can't hang like we used to. We are now night-owls for a different reason...to entertain our little men!

And I am off to do just that!!

Two months and counting...

2008-05-14T22:50:00.005-04:00

Wow, Josh & Brody are two months old already!! I cannot believe how fast the time has flown by! The past 9 weeks have just gone by at light-speed, but at the same time it seems like the boys have been here forever because I could not imagine my life without them!!

I'll have to say that it is extremely hard to raise two little newborns, much harder than I had ever anticipated! And the fact that they are night-owls doesn't help the situation either. I keep on trying to tell them that they will want to stay up late when they are much older and in college when there is drinking to do, not now when Mom & Dad are at their mercy!!

As hard as it is, wow it is so special to be a mom of twins. I still cannot believe that I am a mom of twins and that I carried two little boys in my belly (although my belly believes it quite well and wants to remain this jiggly mushy blob, ick) and now they are here and they are mine...it is quite surreal. They are starting to coo and it is the cutest thing ever, I love hearing their little voices and it makes my heart melt. I cannot wait until they start to notice each other, what a trip that will be!

Another milestone that I am desperately waiting for is the age they can hold their own bottles & pacifiers. It must be quite an amusing sight to watch me feed these guys...I think that the bottles are all propped up in a good position and then just as I go to burp one, the bottle falls on the floor and crying ensues. Then, while fetching the bottle off the floor, the other little one starts crying because I had taken away their bottle to burp them and they are ticked off at mommy! So it is this constant back and forth for the entire feeding that is so amusing that I find myself laughing at the comedy of it all :)

It's just so amazing how fast my little ones are growing...they are both almost double their body weight at birth which is great, but a little sad at the same time. I loved them so tiny in their little preemie clothes that I have now had to pack away, since they are moving into the newborn & 0/3 month sizes now. What a sap I am for being sad to pack up the preemie clothes, but I have a feeling that when the next size gets put away, I will have a little pity party for myself...that's what moms do, right? Get sad that their little ones are growing up.

Here is their two month shot...pardon their expressions, in order to get the picture we had to stuff their faces with binkies and then take them away and quickly get a picture of the two of them not crying, that is a feat in itself!! Now I am off to enjoy my party animals :)

Be careful what you wish for...

2008-05-02T19:48:00.003-04:00

Well, we have officially had both boys home for 24 hours now and I am starting to actually believe that I have twins :) Well, my lack of sleep actually proves that I have twins because we have never been so tired with just one in the house (yeah, what are you moms of singletons complaining of, lol!).

Sleep deprivation has taken on a whole new meaning...really, if the US treated people to this kind of sleep deprivation, there would be no war secrets and Bin Laden would have been found ages ago! Of course, I am exaggerating, but wow it is amazing that when you have two home, it isn't 2x worse, it's actually 3 or 4x worse! I think we both slept a total of three hours last night and that was not in one clump!

Plus, on top of being exhausted, we had to take Josh to his first doctor's appointment. We had already done that with Brody and it wasn't too bad, we got there on time and everything! No such luck this time, but I think we ended up getting there 10 minutes late which wasn't too bad considering how logistically difficult it is to feed, change and get two little newborns out the door!

Josh is officially 8lbs 1oz and is about 1.5lbs heavier than his brother! I'm guessing that he is taking his role of older (by 3 minutes) brother very seriously!

The monitor system we have to hook Josh up to isn't too bad either...he only has to be on it when he is sleeping and we are not watching him, other than that he is cord-free!

What a trip to get to have both home now. It won't be easy, but man, I'll have some great stories for this blog! Here are some of the first photos of the boys together since delivering them...enjoy! Just in case you can't tell, Josh is the bigger one, lol!

Josh is coming home!!!

2008-04-29T15:30:00.006-04:00

WOO HOO!!!
I am so glad to be finally typing that! Our little boy (ha ha, he has a pound on his brother) is finally coming home! Of course, there is a little caveat...since he is having breathing issues still (apparently his brain is a little immature and is causing immature breathing patterns) he will have to come home on an apnea monitor.

What is an apnea monitor?? Good question, I was wondering exactly myself and did what I do best...search the internet for more info. Turns out this portable monitor will be strapped on when Josh is sleeping and will go off (earsplitting I have heard) if he forgets to breath for a period of time. But from what I have heard, there are more false alarms that actual ones, so it sounds like we will be getting very little sleep until we get used to it. He will need to be on the monitor somewhere between 3-6 months which is not going to be fun, but we gotta do what's gotta be done. And I have a feeling that once he is home, he will do a lot better. I have read that once the twins are back together, the twin that doesn't have the breathing issues will help the one that does. So keep your fingers crossed for that!

So in order to get Josh home, we now have to learn how to use this monitor at the hospital which will take somewhere between 4-6 hours! Holy cow! Plus I have to get trained in baby CPR, which is a little scary, but it is a good thing to know anyway.

All that aside, I am beyond thrilled that our family will be together again. It's been a long 7 weeks to get them both home, and now the real fun begins...how on earth do I take care of two?? Here is the latest picture of Team Gillis, apparently Brody likes the taste of Josh :)

I miss my mommy!

2008-04-27T16:57:00.005-04:00

Ok, I know that I sound like a 4 year old when I say that, but I can't help it, it's true. I just dropped off my mom and my aunt at the aiport and almost had a panic attack because there was no one to watch the baby in the back seat while I was driving home. You see, my mom was here for 10 days to help with things, thinking that both boys would be home by now (and as you can see below, they are not). But it was so nice to have her up for such a long time, not only helping me stay up with Brody, but giving me emotional support and the courage to take our first trip to a restaurant with a baby! If it wasn't for her, I don't think we would have tried that for 6 months :)

My point is, that no matter what age we are, we always need our mom and miss her when she is not around. As much as she drove me crazy when I was a teenager and vice versa I am sure...she has been such a great mom. And since my family lives down in PA, I don't get to see her as much as I would like. Plus now, being a new mom I would love for her to just be right down the road when a problems arises since I have no clue what I am doing!

Now that her grandchildren are up here though, they are seriously considering buying a summer place up here and I couldn't be happier! There isn't much to our family (only 8 of us at the Christmas dinner table and that included my husband) so to have them so far really is a bummer, but for 10 glorious days my mom was here, taking care of me and my babies...here are a couple of shots of her with her two grandchildren that she is already spoiling rotten:

And here is a picture of my favorite aunt with her two great-nephews!

As you can see, these two boys are totally not loved...not! I was so spoiled this past week and a half because there was no shortage of people wanting to hold, feed, and change little Brody. Plus they relieved us first thing in the morning so we could get some sleep...I really hope they come back once Josh is home because I will need all the help I can get!

Yet another setback...

2008-04-25T23:11:00.004-04:00

Well, we found out today when visiting Josh in the special care nursery that he had yet another sleeping spell, meaning that he can't come home for another 7 days at the earliest. It is such disheartening news to hear that yet again our little boy is not well enough to be home with us :( And now since my due date was April 22, they are going to start conducting tests to determine what is causing his eating/sleeping spells, so hopefully they will get to the bottom of this...

I have to say that I never imagined how difficult it would be to have one boy at home and another still in the hospital. I never thought that I would have my boys so early in the first place, let alone have them stay in the hospital for so long. Brody was in for just over 2 weeks, while his brother has been in for almost 7 weeks. It's so frustrating because I feel that it is a waste of my maternity leave since I am without both my boys and that Josh and I won't get to bond like I have with my little Brody.

With that said, I realize how much worse this could be...Josh could still be in Boston, but we are lucky enough to have him 5 minutes down the road. And the coordinating of schedules is hard enough, it would be downright impossible if he was so far away. We get to see him everyday and watch him grow. But in all honesty, we just want him home.

Will post any updates when we hear, for now I'll leave you with one of my favorite pics of Josh so far...can't wait to take many more :)

Hello!

2008-04-25T13:58:00.001-04:00

Well I have decided to start a blog now that we have welcomed twin boys into the world! I figure this will be the best thing to keep everyone updated since we have lots of friends and family that is far away and won't be able to keep track of all the comings and goings of the Gillis clan. Hopefully I will keep up with this and keep everyone updated on the commings and goings of Josh & Brody. So, welcome to my blog and I will leave with 1 month photos of my boys since they are the cutest babies in the world...but again, I am biased :)

Josh on left & Brody on right